Desperatly seeking Advice !!

Hi there,

I am writing this hoping someone out there can offer some practical advice. Sorry my story may be long but as you can see I am comming to the end of my tether with the system police etc and don't know where to turn !!

In February my husband and I agreed to split after 11 years. it had always been a turbulent relationship with some cases of domestic violence etc. Should have got out sooner I know !! All Ok to start with we agreed to stay in the property together but it wasn't working and for the safety of myself and child I left the property as he wouldn't !! First Mistake. He then cleared our joint account of £24000 pounds leaving me with no money. As I have no family to turn to I had to rent. I was paying rent bills and caring for a child on low income. I contacted a solicitor but as I could not qualify for legal aid ( too much equity in property) I could not afford to pay their fees. He said he would not give me a divorce and that I would have to wait 2 years !! Then six weeks ago he found out I had a new relationship and made severe threats. I contacted the police because my husband holds firearms and I was scared. They informed me they would issue a Harrassment order against him immediately. They to date still have not !! In the meantime both my sons possessions and mine are still in the property, he has changed the locks and I cannot get access to them. Then on Monday I had had enough I went to the property to get our stuff ( second mistake !!) On entering property he immediately physically attacked me infont of my child and lady that now appears to have moved in !! I told him i was only here to collect my sons belongings. He then dragged me through the house infront of my son threw me at the wall then through me from the house. whilst this lady was constantly shouting at me to get out of the house it wasn't mine everything now belongs to my husband. This has caused myself quite a few injuries and my child is inconsolable. I called the police immediately but unbeknown to me so did my husband. He was later arrested but released on bail. he and his new partner denied everything say they used reasonable force to evict me from the property. I have a serevely sprained ankle whiplash cuts and bruises to the body etc etc. The police have informed me that it is likely they will not prosecute him as it is their word against mine. They will not take my childs statement as he is a minor and it cannot be held viable. They will not take into account my previous calls of harrassment etc which they have done nothing about.

So there I am cut and bruised, No house No possessions, No money. Feel like this man in playing the system very very well I don't know where to turn and I am looking for some good advice from anyone willing to offer it.

Sorry it was so long

Helpless
X

Gosh, this is bad. You have my sincerely sympathies. Your husband's behaviour is totally disgraceful.

First question - is the house in joint names. If it is in his sole name, you need to protect your interest by registering matrimonial home rights. This is not difficult to do but you need to do it to stop him selling or re-mortgaging without your knowledge.

Second, I definitely advise a complete benefits check. You can get this from any Citizens Advice Bureau.

Thirdly, my advice to you would be to make a Womens Aid
organisation your first port of call. These people have a lot of experience in dealing with this type of situation, and they have access to solicitors who specialise in this field.

I wish I could do more but this is definitely a case of horses for courses. Use the experts.

You should certainly get an interest in the house. It seems clear to me from everything you say that you need to divorce but your safety and that of your child is paramount.

Good luck
Mike

helpless,(((((HUGS)))))
it breaks my heart to hear things like this goes on.I cannot offer any help but just back the above.
I want you to know that we are here for you.

hi helpless your story is disgusting, i am not able to get into mh as my ex changed locks and lives with new partner, surley someone should be able to help you and your child, as your ex sounds to be very violent, take care, dave

Hi Helpless
My god that is dreadful.
The only advice I have is to write a letter, recorded delivery to the property informing him that you will be entering the property in seven days to collect your items.
The Police, in view of the circumstances will give you an escort, if they do not, then you should demand one, they can accompany you to avoid any breach of the peace.
I know through experience, but the police offered to accompany me. So go to your local Police station and let them know your intentions. If they do not agree, go to another police station.
Good luck. God that woman is in for it then eventually, if she witnessed that attack on you, she must be stupid to hang around, could be her turn next.
Good luck and keep us posted.
Zara

PS before you write the letter get confirmation from the police

Your best bet is to go to your gp this is the route i went down , your gp can log your injuries and also call out the woman's aid in your area, who will come down to help you and may offer to put you and your child in the refuge.
I would chase up the lastest with the harrasment order and keep pushing there.What ever you do now don't go back to the property alone , sometimes as hard as it sounds you have to get on with what you got and replace items at a later date.