Thinking my husband is in love with another

Dear Sad,

I have dropped two sad's from your user name because I think you have shrugged them off already.

You sound like a very together lady and I admire your spirit. You are right you are in survival mode and you have made a very important step by arranging to speak to a solicitor.

I have a feeling that when he sees how together and practical you are it will scare the pants off him. You go girl.

Remember there's always somebody here for you if the going gets tough.

XXX Fleur XXX

Good luck sad

Its so sad when marriage breaks up and ir sounds like you have a very positive attitude, I wish you lots of luck and hope that you get the outcome that you deserve. You are still very young so dont give up and in the future i`m sure that you will meet a nice man again. Hope to see you in chat.

saffy x

sadsadsad wrote:

Thanks all for the welcome.

As far as it goes I wont fight for him. It may sound contrived when I still love him so much but I don't believe you can make someone love you. Common sense is keeping me sane at the moment.

I've telephoned the number at the top of the page and made an appointment to speak to someone professionally.

Strange isn't it - I feel like i've gone into survival mode! i just want to be sure i'll be able to afford a home of my own and be able to start again on my own.

Thank you all and if anyone has any more words of advice i'd be really pleased to hear them.

I was convinced that 7 years would be lassed as a short term marriage.

x

Hi Sadsad. U wont always be this way BTW. 7 years is not a short marriage. Thats 1 year and at a push 2 years. Since you have both contributed eqaualy I would have thought that 50 / 50 would be a starting point. Seeing as you dont have kids then its never going to be 60 / 40 and above.

His team will of course argue that he purchased the house from his own funds outright. I think thats going to be the hurdle.

But you have a longish marriage and provided you go all the way you should get half.

What may be worth considering is a lump sum payment from your ex as a full and final setlement (Clean Break). This maybe the way it goes eventualy. What you have to offset is what it will cost you to get 50% of the current sale price (which has depressed by 10% and may go on reducing as time goes by) against what you will get. In anycase you will have enough to put down as a sizable deposit on a new place and be able to start again.

By all means take up the offer of free advice on wicki. Make sure you have all your questions pre -prepaired in advance to make full use of the free 30 mins.

I hope it goes ok for you. Best ones C.

Thank you so much for all your help so far. I have phoned the number at the top of the page and have an appointment to speak with a lawyer on Tuesday 2nd September - very quick!

I suppose the reason i'm writing is that I would obviously like to make the most of my 30 minutes and have put together some questions.

I think i've gone through the obvious questions but do you have any advice of things I should definitely speak to the solicitor about?

I'd be grateful for any input.

Thanks

Rather than start a new topic I just thought i'd say hi and let you know that the solicitor call is in half an hour.

I'm bricking it a bit to be honest but have a list of questions.

Wish me luck

x

Hi Sad
Good luck to you, just remain as calm as you can.
Take down lots of notes, because I doubt you will remember it all.
Let us know how it went.
take care, be strong, we are all behind you.

zara

Good luck at the solicitors Sad, keep us informed,
Cindy