Intro

Hi there
I was married for 38 years _ my late husband passed away in 2011.

I subsequently remarried and had been married for around four years, the marriage started out really well, we were both so relieved to have found each other in the final quarter of our lives. Unfortunately things haven’t worked out. His anger issues, jealousy and control issues really emerged in the final year of our being together. It was a shock to be honest, we had really issues that needed to be discussed but instead of facing things and ironing things out he turned the blame on me and within a week was gone. Within 3 months he had got himself sorted out with a place to live, taking his pension with him! So here I am, less than three months into this, at nearly 65 years of age, working for a living again and trying to deal with the shock and trauma of it all. There are days I have to close my door on the world, I am quite introverted at times .. anxiety and panic attacks whoosh up from nowhere at the slightest provocation. I have made the effort to get out and about when I feel able and my social circle is expanding gradually.

To top it all, there seems to be quite a backlog at the divorce courts which means a long delay in the reinstatement of my widows pension.

It is the sense of failure .. I really did put everything into my marriage .. but for it to end so suddenly .. I still haven’t got my head around it.

So that is it in a nutshell ....

Welcome to wikivorce but sorry you find yourself here.

I am so sorry thing didn't work out as you'd hoped.

Please do use this site to vent, ask questions and seek support.

Do you have any property or assets in joint names that needs to be sorted out?

Does he have the financial means to support you while the pension is sorted out?

Has the divorce petition gone in?

It is hard to deal with stuff like this when you are in emotional distress but it is really important to look after your future.

Hadenoughnow

Hi there, it’s firstly thank you for replying, it is most appreciated. We don’t have any property or assets in joint names, it was me who had the property and my soon to be ex had no financial assets or property assets. When we separated We abided by the premarital agreement that we had drawn up which endorsed a Clean Break divorce. We are clear of a lot of the issues that might complicate things, thankfully. The divorce petition has gone in and it isn’t being contested so we are at that stage. There is no financial support for me unfortunately, but I have managed to get a little part time job which is helping to bridge the gap until such time that I can get my widows pension reinstated. This is why it is so important to me that the process isn’t a lengthy one!