Separated and severe depression

Hi my name is Anthony and i am 49 and my ex wife is 40 of twenty years left me 18 months ago and i am still struggling with depression and was told by counsellor maybe ptsd i have read some posts about not being able to go out and not eating etc not functioning for my three kids i tried to overdose last August an it all too familiar i see no end to this and am so desperate as i have no support not even from gp or mental health team. I feel I am goin insane an frightened i will lose my job. My wife is buying me out no and will be moving back in and i will hav to leave an no where to go we had everything in life an cant get over what she has done to me an kids. I am absolutely terrified of my future an cant face life anymore not even for my kids and i know that is terrible as i love them so much an am failing them. I hav tried various AD’s to no avail and constantly overthinking an blaming myself for everything guilt regret and remorse even though she walked out on me and the kids whilst having an affair now she just bullies me an puts kids and dog onto me every chance she gets. Going about her business as if nothing has happened I work shifts 6 days a week but i just cant go on living in hell please help ?

I'm so sorry to read your story, 18 months isn't long enough to accept and get over what's happened especially after such a long marriage.

I think you should look after yourself and put yourself first, stay strong and don't give up. It will get better I promise. Keep yourself busy with work, gym, meeting family and friends. Focus on your self and you will see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Someone once told me that once you feel you're at the bottom the only way is up.

Keep posting on here and I promise you will get a lot of support. This was the best place for me when I was feeling exactly the same as you.

Thankyou so much I can only try

Sorry to read your situation - I can sympathise and I hope that is a small comfort. Keep posting. It helps. Hope you have better days ahead. It's still raw don't expect too much from yourself too soon. You have made it this far - well done. Absolutely agree you will have Ptsd it's a huge shock and you need to be so kind to yourself. Focus on self care to heal. You are working that's a huge achievement during this time. Give yourself credit where credit is due. Stop thinking about your ex. Own your thoughts and feelings and only embrace positivity. Don't let her get you down you already have enough on your plate. Take care.

I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you are trying to come out of this difficult phase of life. I know it hurts very bad, many a time you will even feel like getting back to her. But now you have to be strong at least for your kids and for their bright future, you will have to concentrate back in your daily work schedule, for the betterment of kids future life. I think at this stage, you should contact the estate planning lawyer , who will guide you properly and will also help you in making some financial legal decisions about the future.

It gets better, I promise. My husband of 23 years pulled the rug out from under us with no warning and me and the kids all struggled massively. Other than crying on friends, the thing that kept me going was seeing other divorced people with new lives and enjoying them. I became a bit of a Facebook stalker looking at pics of divorced friends/acquaintances out and about with new partners looking gloriously loved up and recalling their utter devastation only a couple of years before.
Now I’m one of their gang too.

Use your friends
Drag yourself out
Do some exercise
Facebook stalk happy divorced people

Good luck xxx