Too scared to leave him.

Hi all,

Some brief background first;

I met my husband when I was 15, he was 20. After a few months we parted company because my parents didn't approve of our relationship. We got back together when I was 19, had my first child at 20, second child at 22, married in '96 and had third child at 25.

Over the years my husband has become more and more controling (if I were to tell you all that he does this introduction would become a book!). I left him in 2000 for 5 months, only going back for financial reasons (I was too proud to go through the CSA. What a fool I was!) and because he wouldn't leave me alone. He would follow me, call me constantly on the phone (silent phone calls) and threaten suicide. He has punched holes in doors inches from my face, driven the car like a maniac with me in it, is horrible to the pets (he does this sneakily) and he's mean to the children. He is very domineering too.

Here I am nearly 13 years down the line and unable to tolerate him anymore, I thought I could stick it out until the children were older, but I can't. So I am going to have to summon up the courage to tell him that I want him to leave, then pray!

So this is my story, albeit only half of it!

I think you need to go to CAB and get some advice about this. Can you afford to go elsewhere with the children? Is he likely to move out because you ask him to?

If he is abusive - and it sounds like he is - your local police may be able to help.

This sounds horrendous, you need some proper advice before it gets worse.

Here is a link to the Domestic Violence helpline and some good advice on this page.



www.womensaid.org.uk/?gclid=CNSV5cOI95UCFQLolAod6VMg3w


Come and join us in chat for some more advice and if anything support and someone to talk to and we will listen.

You will need to copy and paste the link, also take a look in the Wiki library for some more advice.

Please take care and I wish you luck.

Saffy xxx

Hi No Regrets,
I'm afraid I can't afford to move out as I don't have an income of my own at the moment (although I am actively looking for work). I know that if I were to have my own income it would allow me to move out if he refuses to go, I see this as my only option at the moment.

Getting the police involved scares me, it would be like holding a red rag to a bull, although I know it will probably come to that, knowing what he's been like in the past.

CAB is one avenue I haven't thought about, will get in touch with them as soon as.

Short of him falling off the face of the Earth, I can't see any easy way out of this, he's certainly got me where he wants me!

Thanks for your reply

Thanks Saffy x

Hi howmuchlonger

I've been in your situation - I'm not posting details here. If you would like to talk please post to my profile and I'll get it honey

Shezi xx

Please seek help. He really sounds like the typical abuser. I know.

You are not alone.

Brig