arguing

hi, i googled 'how to stop arguing' and happened upon this site. still finding my way but, as proposed, this post is to introduce myself. i'm not sure if i have the most argumentative girlfriend in the world or perhaps its just me! i have been on and off with this lady for the last 2½ years and just don't know if things are going to change! she is the most intolerant person i have ever met. i love her dearly but i really don't know if we are ever going to stop arguing! i constantly find myself rolling my eyes and sighing as she goes off on one - the other day she pulled me up for saying 'mum' rather than 'my mum' when referring to a chat i had had with . . . er . . . my mum - she said she's not my mum she's yours. i asked if she was cold last night, she reacted by saying yes, she was, she had every right to be cold and just because i might not be (i wasn't) i should stop telling her how to be! we're talking about getting married (i have 3 kids from past relationships and i consider myself to be normal, despite my life over the last 5 years reading like an eastenders script) and i feel that that may calm her down i.e. if she's is settled, she may take things easier. what do you all reckon out there? i can argue for england if i need to, but i just don't want to!!

Sounds like you need to have a good chat and if the reaction is "I don't know what the probelm is" then you need to tell her how you feel.

If she then talks over you and dismisses your feelings (and nobody can argue with how you feel then its off to Relate or walk away.

Relate do publish a book on this topic. Check out their website.

Good luck.