how to cope?

i'm new here. partner left three days ago for someone else after 8 years. we have a 1 year old and 4 year old. it's just so horrible. how do you cope?

welcome to Wiki.

I know EXACTLY how you feel, as do alot of others on this website. I found talking (via here and with friends) helped ALOT. Have a read of other posts in the forum. You are not alone and there is ALWAYS a friendly ear to listen to you (me included). I have started a blog (never thought i'd do that !!) and that makes me feel better when I am feeling down.

Hi - poor you. How any man can leave children so young is beyond me. We all cope in different ways at different times. One day at a time.
In the early days "coping" meant just being able to get up for the boys. I've cried a lot - over used friends - phoned samaritans - and am on anti depressants. Gradually taking control has helped, even if it has just been getting on top of house hold chores. Making changes - big and small. The boys and i have new routines and have made new plans for Xmas. I have a new hairstyle and focusing on my career. It does get better and there are times when you take backward steps but it helps knowing other people on here know what you are going through. Take care of yourself and wee ones.

thank you. i have read some other posts and it seems the emotions are similar for everyone. i just don't know how to deal with him. and then you are expected to be civil for the children. my poor babies....

thefirstlady wrote:

i'm new here. partner left three days ago for someone else after 8 years. we have a 1 year old and 4 year old. it's just so horrible. how do you cope?

Bless you!! You cope believe it or not by doing what your doing now, using this forum to gain insight and experiances of others, I am 3 months on now and this forum is a great help. We all feel for you right now, don't blame yourself all of the time, ok? Take care

I truly feel for you, how can anyone walk out on 2 babies like he has for someone else? You will find lots of support & good advice here to help you through.
Was it all a shock or did you suspect his affair a long time?
I know how devastating it is to find out your partner is with someone else, but it does get easier after a few months, once you start to accept it.
We are here for you, take care
Cindy

I found out in march and asked him to stay and try for their sake. but he refused to stop contact with her which obviously caused a great deal of friction. he also confessed to another affair when i was pregnant with our first child. so i've been trying to process this for a few months now and accept my life with him has been a complete sham. but we still have two very young children and i feel devastated for them. my four year old keeps asking when is daddy coming home. i want them to have a happy childhood but he has caused so much pain it seems unbearable at the moment. thank you for your kind messages.