Don't know what to do

I've been married for 25 years but the marriage hit the rocks about 10 years ago.

My wife is a chronic alcoholic and life is hell on earth!

We have 5 children - two have left home (eldest son married and daughter was driven out by her mother's behaviour). 3 boys still at home - 17year old and 14 year old twins.

I work full time and need to work from home after hours to make ends meet. My wife doesn't work.

She is a very disorderly drunk - screaming abuse (mainly at me) and, the worst thing, deliberately depriving us of sleep at nights. This wrecked my daughter's GCSE year (for which my daughter has never forgiven her) and is now threatening the twins' exams.

Over the past 5 years she has called the emergency services (police and ambulance) to the house on numerous occasions. They have been very supportive to me but say they're not social workers. My wife refuses any treatment but has been seen by psychiatrists during her 'hospital stays' who declare her sane once she's sober. Social Services aren't interested because there's a responsible adult (me) in the house.

She left 6 months ago to live with a bloke she met in the off licence and things were easier but she would still return to take food or look for money. During this time she signed on benefits. The house is in joint names so I guess legally she can come and go as she pleases. But now she's had enough of her new friends and decided to come back.. and life is hell! We absolutely can't live in the same house. I don't really want to leave the house because I don't trust her to look after the lads properly, plus I can't afford another place let alone move the office equipment out.

I'm really depressed. Worried sick about the cost of seeing a lawyer to sort this mess out (if it even can be sorted out!). Tired and stressed out. I'd sell the house today if I could but it's in poor condition and next door has been on the market for 2 years now. I just don't know what to do.

Oh my, what a mess, you must feel like you're losing your mind.
I know the house is in joint names, but surely she doesn't have the right to just walk back in after 6 months. You should have changed the locks!!
The children are surely suffering emotional abuse. Sleep deprivation is a form of abuse.
I'm sorry I'm not being very helpful, but I'm not sure of the legal side of things. I know for a fact she's not allowed to impact on the children in a detrimental way. Go to your doctor, the school, get them to write the change in the children since she left, and what the were like before she left. If your doctor reports her to social services, surely they have to listen?

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