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Hi, found site whilst looking for advice on separation. Married 7yrs, 3 kids (2 at home still). Have been thinking about leaving for a while but things now at a head and I've made my intentions clear to my OH. Biggest worry is about the kids (10yr and 5yr) and not managing financially afterwards. But having made the decision seriously this time I'm quite eager for things to progress. It is very scary!! But scarier to stay in an unhappy marriage
Hopefully I can find lots of help and advice on here cos I'm sure I'm gonna need it!!!!!!

Hi and welcome to wiki

You've come the right place for advice and support, calling time on your marriage is not an easy decision no matter what the reasons are.

Keep posting and pop into chat, were a friendly bunch who will make you feel welcome

Dawn x

Hi - thought I'd respond as you were looking abit low on replies!!

I saw Solicitor on Weds to file for divorce. It was easy, painless & VERY liberating!! I too was scared but felt like weight off my shoulders when I left Solicitor's office.

Married 17 yrs, 3 adopted kids, youngest 2 (17 & 15 yrs) still at home.

I was also mostly worried about finances, but seems better than I feared, and I keep reminding myself, I'd rather be living on the bread line than in the current situation. At the end of the day we can live according to our means.

CSA expect husband to pay 20% of nett income, and you should be entitled to 60-65% of equity in your home if kids going with you.

Hope goes well for you

you have taken the first steps in moving forwards with your life, but we are all different and it takes differing amounts of time for people to reach different stages. like you, i took a long time to get to the decision to call time on my marriage, i also have 3 kids and it breaks my heart to think that i am denying them a happy family home BUT, it wasn't that happy when we were together and its a darn sight happier now we have decided to part ways. its amicable so far, he is still living here although separately but i begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel and that we might all move on. like you, i am worried about finances but i decided that i could worry about that for ever and never do anything - today i called tax credits and sorted out my own single claim, its a step forwards and i intend to do something positive each day towards the future. good luck, you will find lots of advice on here
pink x

Hello and welcome to Wiki. You have taken a brave step. Well done! I too have taken that step in the week. It's so scary; what an underestimation! You have come to the right place. The people here are fantastic, the support brilliant and writing things down really helps. Sending you a big hug. I hope to see you in chat soon; we laugh and cry together in there.
x

Thank you for all the replies, I'm feeling like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, no pretence to keep up
It's really hard living in the same house though, esp when he is moping about, sometimes he works from home and I am having to stay out to avoid him, this isn't what he wants and he isn't dealing with the reality of it. I feel for him but his unhappiness isn't going to change my mind.
This site has been invaluable to me this past week, I have been on everyday finding out answers to the hundreds of questions I have. I have solicitor app on Mon and Tues, it is a scary business that keeps waking me up at night but I feel so in control of my life again. We haven't told the 2 youngest kids yet as there isn't alot of info to give them but I'm not dreading telling them anymore because I can see the bigger picture. I'm very tired today due to the poor sleep but I still feel happy inside!!!

LM58, you go girl!!

pink x