Relieved but in shock

magenta, it never ceases to amaze me the stories I read on here and what people put other people, people they're supposed to care about, through. The lies are the worst, I know. I know that I could personally have coped a lot better knowing that he had had an affair, that he doesn't love me anymore etc etc. But instead I am treated terribly, it's all my fault, he wasn't happy for years and years....all the same as you. You are in the right place - I am so grateful to have found this site and the support of the people who are here. There is no quick fix I'm afraid but even I can say, whilst pregnant with my husband's third child, that things can and do get better. Take care of yourself, you'll be fine. Liz x

Magenta sorry you have found yourself on this site but its the best site around with lots of people who can offer you support and help.

It must have been a terrible shock and embarrassment for you and your family and friends. its weird that we can be married for such a long time and yet still not really know our partners (scarey)

Take Care

JJ

Thanks for your message of support - you`re absolutely right - why do these people put us through all this, even though they`re supposed to care - do we really know anyone? I`d always had my doubts about him but you just keep on hoping things will get better - how wrong can you be. Sorry to hear about your situation - I guess things can only get better but it doesn`t seem like it at present.

Hi Magenta

I can totally understand where you are coming from. My story goes along those lines as well. It is very hard to even think from where you start to deal with it.

But i will tell you that it does get better. Best thing to realise is that it is no reflection on you Magenta...who he was and his true nature. So you dont have to feel guilty of anything.

Thanks for sharing your story. And things do improve!!!

Take care
Claudette

Thanks for all your messages everybody. Trouble is I do feel used and abused and it is early days yet - I filed for divorce in January after another horrible Xmas & New Year of nasty behaviour from him - he seemed relieved when I told him and was too weak to come out and tell me. I realise that when I met him I was rather vunerable and he obviously wanted to use me for his own ends - trouble is it`s our son I feel sorry for & elderly aunts and uncles. Luckily our parents have all passed away (I know my dad would have strung him up) but I do wonder if his parents knew as I`ve found out several things about him since from various people - the one thing I find hard is how he hid it behind a respectable veneer - the big house, the son at private school, big cheese in the City etc. Just hope I can get on with my life sometime soon.