How do we agree seperation???

My wife and I have agreed we cant go on living in same house and that she does not want to be with me, and we should get seperated. But I am confused as I saw in a forum someone applied for a seperation, is this the case we have to apply?
Does it depend where you live?

Or can we agree this is what we want and then go about the procedure?
Does it have to be formally recorded in writing so it can be used should we seek a divorce in 12 months time as long as everything is agreed between us?

Pelicanary

Hi Peli

You can agree to separate without any formalities. But at some point, you will need to start thinking about the formal separation in terms of finances and child arrangements.

Most couples can agree, in the interim, on such arrangements to suit the current circumstances. However, before you can apply for a divorce, both parties will need to agree formally on finances and child arrangements.

This is done by way of a Separation Agreement, in which clauses set out in very clear terms what is agreed on asset split, child arrangements and any aliment. child maintenance may also be included if the CSA are not used. The agreement is then drawn up and entered into the Book of Councils, making it a legally binding document. Finances and child arrangements need to finalised before applying for a divorce action. As you have children under the age of 16 you will be required to use the Ordinary Procedure.


More information can be found in our step-by-step guide -

www.wikivorce.com/divorce/Scotland/Scotl...ng-The-Marriage.html

Just post if/when you have any more questions.

Ruby

our children are 20 and 22 so dont have any worries with them. I thought if we could agree to sort out finances amicably and agree a date the searation should commence a year down the line we could if necesary apply for a divorce. I am confused as to whether we have to have leagal documents for this and if so how do we go about that.

If you can agree the finances between yourselves write it down and take what was agreed to a solicitor who can draft a separation agreement. Once it is registered with the courts a separation agreement is legally binding.

Then as there will be no outstanding finances or children under 16 you can apply for divorce yourself after one year with the consent of your wife or two years without consent using the simplified procedure. The form and guide is available at the Scottish Courts website or in the Wikivorce Scottish library.

Hope that helps.

Hi Pel,

I am going thru Separation at the moment as Ruby mentioned at some stage or othe you will both have to formalize things.

In Scotland divorce if thats what you both end up wanting will only be granted after all the financial side of things have been sorted out.

I really hope for both your sakes that you can do it all amicably.
Thats what our plan was but it has changed dramatically & this is the case sadly for alot of people on wiki & those who aren't!

When things like the marital home & finances need to be discussed it can get messy.

You will both need SOL's at some stage to give you advice on agreements & also if you sort out these things before going thru the divorce side of things. There will generally be no reason for the courts to not grant the divorce.

Also drawing up & agreeing now will save you both money even though you will have to pay SOL's to set up the sep agreement.

Good luck to you both & hope it can be settled amicablly.

L4N

Hiya Peli, i too am separated and i appreciate that i am younger and had a short marriage but the same principles apply.
You don't have to draw anything up, you can just leave like i did, the FMH is up for sale and the modest capital (40K) Will be split 50/50.
I told ex she could have it all but she insists we split it so i can't complain. In the ideal world we could all do that but i suppose it would be advisable to get things written down and agreed legally, especially where the pot is much larger and there is pensions etc involved.
Our capital is much too small for ex to buy somewhere so i suppose she doesn't have the same interest in grabbing a bigger share.

Hope you can sort it out amicably, Chris.

So am I to assume we cannot agree on a seperation just by ourself, and there has to be a formal separation agreement drawn up by a solicitor before we can file for a divorce?????????
P