Mortgage Worries

Found out she gets £1260 in her pocket with CM.
How do I get Nationwide to agree to interest only when they won't until stbx agrees to speak to them?. People advise not to default or fall into arrears on mortgage but what choice do I have? Thought they would be more reasonable.

Yes I'm willing to let her use all of equity to get herself a house with the kids if she gets her own mortgage. Trouble is she reckons she cant get one for the money and mediator still banging on about getting another mortgage with her in order to house kids.
Even my sol reckons this could be less of two evils, he reckons she could get Spousal maintenance to cover present mortgage! How when I get £1920 net and have to house myself.

I think you should be paying nothing to the mortgage if you do not live there and have a rented place. It should be her worry about getting Nationwide to agree to interest only sure pay the CM but the mortgage issues are hers she should of put thought into this when she wanted out, but probably like my ex focused on finding a new bloke instead.

Spousal maintenance? you can not or be made to pay money you just do not have. Maybe another way of looking at it would be: do you have space in your place to have the kids live with you? Sell the house half the equity and your ex can then enjoy the single life.

Like pete said to not be a mug.

Lucky (although not at the time) for me my ex did not have the courage to leave until she found a replacement who moved in within days of me leaving so i did not have any of this nonsense he has even help her to buy me out. And do not get a mortgage with so one you are going to divorcing that would be like taxing a car with no engine!

Look mate she does not want to be with you anymore that's your problem, she cannot pay the current mortgage on her own that's her problem

all the best

You won't have to pay spousal maintenance at all.
You said she's got £1260 a month coming in.
Plus eventually your 20% child maintenance tax free another £385 from you for the kids that will leave her with £1745.
You will have £1920 -£385 cm £1545 per month.
That's why again she'll end up wanting 100% of the house equity.You'll prolly have to settle for the standard 80% that every workin bloke has to give up because even solicitors know a judge won't rubber stamp the 100%/0% split on a Consent Order.
Look the deal to your wife should be Interest only mortgage.She stays in the house.You pay her the child maintenance and that covers the mortgage payments.She'll still want her 80% of the house equity when the kids are 18 and it is sold because she'll pull the other statutory female argument of "But i'll be paying all the maintenance on the house"
Once she knows she's staying in the house your probably find your unpaid babysitting service access will kick in every other weekend quite nicely.If you let her stay in the house then noones has the expense of moving.
Then enjoy as she moves her new "friend" in in about a month later who doesn't stay there and just sleeps on the sofa and it's none of your business anyways.
Despite the last bit I'm deadly serious about what the deal you should propose should be.
As for buying your own placew forget about it until the kids are adults or find a divorced woman who divorced a bloke richer than you and also got a free house and live with her.
All the best
Pete xx

Pete,

You said a judge would not sign 100% equity in the house to one party. My stbx has a large military pension already inpayment. I was hoping to take the house and leave his pension in tact. Do you think a judge would allow this. I'm not being greedy, he his quite comfortable living with OW and I am panicking about housing me and two kids. Any advice welcome.

Thanks

90/10 they never go 100%.
Would really show up how biase the system was otherwise.
Mr Popoliv don't have a big military pension.
Thanks for clarifying my main point every woman wants all the house equity.
It's a nesting thing.
All the best
Pete xx

Pete

Need to clarify mate. £1260 is what she reckons is her TOTAL income including my CM. She reckons she only works 12 days part time per month!. She also gets cash in hand from her hairdressing.
No way can she afford mortage on FMH. Thats why she wants me to pay it in full!
Nationwide won't agree interest only. Mediator recommends sale of house. If and big if it sells equity would be about £110,000. I'm agreeable to her having it all to re house herself and kids as long I'm mortgage free.She has been told she can get a £39,000 mortgage on her own. Of course I'd expect my 20% when youngest turns 18.
What I can't get is both my sol and mediator saying I should get another mortgage with her so she can re house herself and kids and that it might be lesser of two evils ie order for spousal at court.
Lots on here saying just don't pay mortgage not your problem but sol advises against it and so do others on here because of the damage it will do to my credit. Thats why I'm so confused!

Go to court and ask for 60/40. The judge will meet you in the middle as equality is just as important as providing a home for the children. Ask to sell the house if you have enough equity in the FMH to buy two homes with respective mortgages. Remember mum can easily increase her earning capacity by taking on more hours. She gets all the allowances. Your maintenance payments will also have a big impact on your mortage capacity so you need as much from your estate as possible.