hi everyone

I am a solicitor with experience in family law, particularly in dealing with property and ancillary relief.

I am not here to push you to use my business or anything like that, if i can help someone to help themselves then all the better.

I have noticed that solicitors do get a bad press, we do have to earn a living but communication, being open and frank will allow your solicitor and you to have a good working relationship.

I hope to be assisting you all soon.

Welcome to Wiki

hello Amit

here's a q

my sol said that i should offer her 500 pounds as she was dv me on grounds of 'ub'

and all stupid reasons too....even the sol said so

she had asked that i pay her costs!

he said the judges normally award the cost against the person who is being dv for ub

is this true

or have i just gifted her 500 for nothing?

The normal rules that costs follow the event do not apply in family proceedings. Any application for costs must be justified and if the parties are on an even footing, the DJ is unlikely to award costs and usually each side pays their costs.

I presume that the petition was contested which is presumably why costs are being debated. The golden rule I follow, you want costs then you must be prepared to justify the application to the DJ.

If there is a litigation mis-conduct ie failure to comply with practice direction, rule or order then costs could be applied for.

another question relating to property.

How can I stay in the FMH with my children, have the house transfered to me as I will not be able to afford the mortgage alone , allowing my stbx to buy another property.

Or

Allow us both to buy an additional property jointly till such times that a trigger makes both properties sole..............is that possible.

i guess I am looking for the best scenario for both of us, I want to stay in fmh although it will have to be sold eventually as too big. If we sell it now I will not have enough equity to raise another mortgage as too low an income. Ex has come up with the joint additional property till such times that fmh is sold thus paying me the remainder of the settlement and downsizing himself.

Am I making sense, just not sure how it all works. I am self repping so need to get my head around it all.

thanks

moon x

hello Amit thanks for the reply

the petition was uncontested

i was furious at being asked to pay for her to divorce me on spurious and lying grounds #

my sol said don't waste money fighting the petition

and to offer her £500 with the codicil that no further demands would be made for costs from her

and that the reasons given in the petition would not be used in future a/c relief proceedings

he said that in 95% of cases he has experienced the judge awards part / all cost against the 'ub' party

as her sol had pushed for all her dv costs to be paid by me

he suggested the above and a letter was sent to that effect

thank you for any advice...i'm not going to get into a argurment with my sol quoting you but it's good to get some feedback from another pro

hello Amit

i posted this a many months ago and go some advice do have any advice as to what you think would be a reasonable settlement and why?




Hello,

I would greatly appreciate advice on a possible settlement.
My wife has suddenly left me saying she loved me but wanted more out of life and now wants a divorce.

She has refused counselling but said that I need it and not us.

I've never hit or swore at her, we've had arguments but always made up within an hour or two. In the last 5 months she never mentioned she was considering this and 1 day before she left she was telling me she loved me.

I feel utterly devastated and would love to reconcile and do admit I was far from perfect. Currently she blames the break up on me and has not accepted any responsibility (it may change in the future though). I love and adore her but am giving her space (minimal contact) at her request. She barely acknowledges I exsist or attempts to talk to me. Only getting in contact for practical matters.


I paid
[1] The deposit on the house (140K deposit), (it's in my name as she had no salary / job when it was bought and we were not married or living together. I also wanted to protect her from being chased by mortgage company.)
[2] home improvements (about £20,000)
all mortgage payments,
[3] bought the car,
[4] council taxevery year
[5] and all major purchases. TV, bed etc

She paid / pays
[1] utility bills,
[2]groceries
[3]car insurance
[4] sofa
[5] going out costs (about £50 to 100 a month)

Your respective ages;
Me. 33 Her 27

The number of children you have and their ages;
none n/a

How many nights the children spend with each parent;
none n/a

The length of your marriage and any period of pre marriage cohabitation;
1 yr 8 months cohabitation.
3 yrs 5 months marrage until she walked out

Your respective incomes;
as of this year 40,000 me and 36,000 her.

Your respective outgoings;
mine currently £1000.00
hers £400 max

Your assets - both soley held and joint;
400,000
House 250,000 paid deposit of £140 k, + all mortgage payment. It's in my name so is the mortgage debt of 100K
Her savings £50k
My savings £100k
Car I bought for £13k in 2006 now worth £5k (her estimate).

Your liabilities.
100000 mortgage debt in my name

Please could you help?
What do you think would be a reasonable settlement and why?

Thank you for your help.