Alone For The First Time In 19 Years

Hi, I am alone For The First Time In 19 Years and it's pretty difficult. My Wife decided to finish our relationship two weeks ago, I didn't realise how lonley you could be until now. We have two fantastic boys and I miss them a lot. I am sure time will ease the pain I am feeling. What makes things worse, looking back at things it is clear that the seperation is all my fault. I am sure most of you know "you don't know what you have until you lose it"... Dont know how I ended up on this site, no one to speak to I suppose.

Same for me eight weeks ago i found myself in the same situation after 23 years, although i still have my 3 children with me every day they have been a great support, but my STBX phones them and sees them as much as he/they want, and it works.

I felt exactly the same at 2 wks, but the old cliche "time is a great healer" is actually true, we both have an uphill struggle ahead of us but keep positive and the best piece of advice some one gave me was "it gets a little bit easier every day"

I don't often post on this site but i do use it almost every day when i'm feeling in need of some support and i always find it here, there's an awful lot of us going through the same pain at the moment. so keep logging in.

Keep your chin up and don't be too hard on yourself, it takes 2 to make a marriage work and both have to want it.

Thanks. It's pretty difficult today.

You will find that you have good days and bad days and often there is no apparent reason why! A friend described it to me as a rollercoaster and she was right. Important thing is not to beat yourself up over it, drag yourself through the bad days, make the most of the good ones and you will get through this and build a new life.

All the best

Hey chuck

We all have up and down days. I certainly do. Hopefully you will be able to see your kids as much as you can, and build a good relationship there. Something to focus on. If it's over for good and you know it, then theres a good place to start - afresh. While it may be so hard that some days you really can't face the world, you know you have to and you know what has to be done.
Embrace all your emotions, as they will help you move forward with little steps each day and each week.
Post on here as often as you need to, and read about others struggles and achievements too. It has been a godsend to me finding this site.
I also go into the chat room. Everyone is fantastic, and all have the time of day for you.
Stay strong, you never know what's just around the corner xxx
Janine

Hi Woodster

Of course you are finding it difficult. It's only 2 weeks. It took me about 8 months to get used to being alone after 31 years as a couple, and I needed months of anti-depressants and counselling.

Be kind to yourself. Pop into chat, contact your old friends, join a club. All these things can help.

But time will make things easier.

Thanks for all your advice. I am sure time will heal etc. It's so difficult, I keep thinking about all the good times we had as a family, all the laughter, birthdays, Holidays, and Christmas... My wife only seems to think of bad times, but I think this helps her to stick to her decision.

Thanks,

Paul.