Uselessness

Ii Hanna, I seem to be in similiar circumstances as my marriage of 24 years fell apart very suddenly. My husband says that he isn't having an affair, but social life has suddenly taken off! I truly understand about the pain and the endless thinking about the lies. I'm trying to keep positive. See you in the chat room perhaps? xxx

insanity is a sane response to a insane world a quote I remember Lang or somebody but I think It has some reference inside a relationship or am I mad? what do you lot think

I have been asked on a pM if I intend to take revenge. My clear answer is NO. Revenge is not an option but life has a funny way of sorting things out by itself. I feel that many posters feel themself useless and not in control when things go wrong. We blame ourselves. We see ourselves as worthless. All part of the human emotion / shock/ other party justifying their actions etc. Im about to attend a course on building myself up mentally. Imm fed up with being battered and bruised by somebody else so yes I did post that I will come out fighting. Firstly fighting my inner doubts and then fighting to progress on with my life. No need for revenge. That happens by itself. !!!!

i m sorry to have been the one to pm you.
was really curious as to what the post meant.
i feel that you do need to work on yourself.
when your own self esteem grows etc, you will not care about what your ex is upto and how she will get hers etc etc.
believe me this is easier said than done and i fully understand where you are at.
i hope i did not offend you as that is not my intention.

No problems whatsover. Like all on this site we are flapping in the wind until we catch a branch. Offence was not taken and I welcome PMs as it shows me people care. If there was anyone who needed Wiki and advice..even reprimands !!! it was me. Unfortunately I found it late and maybe to late to recover from the situation I now find myself in. So please feel free to PM me anyone. I wont mention names in the main forum.

its never too late for anyone. its a long slow process.
i am still making some mistakes but i am getting much better at thinking about my reaction etc. i do however slip into bitter mode.
it is getting less and less each day.
you get up brush off and get on.
when you hit the bottom the only way is up.
please dont give up though.

even if you end your relationship it is hard. all parties are hurting at this delicate time. allow for that, except your grief and this will help you to move on.one day at a time.
i just woke up one day and realised i had not thought about it for a while.
it becomes easier day by day.

good luck