What a mess.

Shuiiz,
Thanks for the Hugs I sure need them.

Thanks also for the reply and your heartfelt sharing of your pain.

Try to think of your hubby as trapped in the male menopause and the need he has to prove he is still virile.

My hubby is just like that, at 63 thinks he is John Travolta in Grease ! It makes me laugh at how stupid and childish he is and as bald as a badger with a fat gut but he thinks he is Haagen Daaz !

But to tell you the absolute truth he has been impotent for 20 years and bought a penile pump in order to get an erection !!!

I bet he doesn't pump it up in front of his 35 year old.

Thought I would give you a laugh at that, BUT maybe it was just too much information. Feelinf VINDICTIVE

Anyway stay in touch and if we can encourage each other all the better.

Hugs
ceebee2

Your last post made me smile... I am not alone after all. ha ha - they are absolute idiots if it comes right down to the nitty gritty!

I would like to stay in touch because you made me smile!
xx

Hi there again Ceebee2. I followed your advice and it was most beneficial. Thank you.

I have been thinking about you too, and if you need to talk privately at any time what so ever, please let me know and we can make telephone contact. I know just to well there are times in the night you just need to off load! Promise I can be a good listener.

Regards
S

((((((((((((((((Shuiiz)))))))))))))))))

What a difference in 11 days, I am so glad you have found wiki and the support and knowledge its members provide. You dont scare me any more...lol

Best Wishes

Elle x

Ha, ha I am glad I don't scare you anymore Elle.. and yes I have had advice that I never thought of in my grief, thank you.

I think seeing so many broken hearted here made me realise I am not alone. Though nights like tonight when I cannot sleep I still find it weakens me. but it will soon be dawn then I will sleep.

Go well.
S
x

Hi Shuiiz,
I'm glad you are feeling better, I havent been online lately. I've had a phonecall from the husband saying he wants to come home but will look for a flat if I dont agree. I really don't care about him anymore. I feel cool, calm, confident and happy to be on my own. Hope you continue to gain confidence too and yes we will stay in touch
Hugs
ceebee2

Good for you CeeBee2. I am pleased you are being strong and moving forward and enjoying being alone.

Last week I suddenly had this flash that I too was "actually happier on my own", doing what I wanted to do, not having to jump or hide from temper tantrums.. being in charge of the tv remote control, listening to MY choice of music, watching what I WANTED on Tv and generally just enjoying peace.

This was perhaps my first step forward. A baby step, but at least it is going forward.

No doubt there will be many slips along the way as my X2B is still phoning me and using me as a means of making the new slug jealous. It is unfair that he should phone me during their fights in front of her asking me if he can come back, and it hurt me deeply the first few times because it tugged at my heart strings and I wanted to scream YES!!!! But on Saturday, after my realization that I enjoyed my own peace, he tried it again and I thought whoooopeee girl - now it is she who is going through what you did for all those years... She is welcome to the abuse and tantrums after a night of drinking. She is welcome to the highs and lows and being controlled by mind games.

I will not answer any more calls late at night because I can be sure it will be him and her going through another fight. I do no longer have to partake in his games - that is her baby now.

This will make you smile. I placed a giant Teddy Bear that he gave me years ago on his chair in the lounge.. not to represent him, but it actually makes me feel there is someone here with me! Actually come to think about it - it's probably better company because it actually listens to me when I speak!



Best wishes
S