my story

I think men (and some women) can have sex without emotional attachment. Sorry if you've read this wrong. I'm NOT suggesting ALL men will/can do this.

In adarims post she's asking if her ex still has 'feelings' (?) and is trying to understand why they're still having a sexual relationship.

My post re: Having Double-Bubble suggests that many men (yes, and some women!) could just go to someone for Consenting-Adult-Recreational-Activity (F**K Buddies as one American colleague once called it!)

I'm not of this school of thought, but it happens that many adults (men and women) have recreational sex Marshy. (Hence my reference to standing on a street corner!)

But it's chilly today, so I won';t do that - not even to prove a point.

Sera wrote:

I think men (and some women) can have sex without emotional attachment. Sorry if you've read this wrong. I'm NOT suggesting ALL men will/can do this.

In adarims post she's asking if her ex still has 'feelings' (?) and is trying to understand why they're still having a sexual relationship.

My post re: Having Double-Bubble suggests that many men (yes, and some women!) could just go to someone for Consenting-Adult-Recreational-Activity (F**K Buddies as one American colleague once called it!)

I'm not of this school of thought, but it happens that many adults (men and women) have recreational sex Marshy. (Hence my reference to standing on a street corner!)

But it's chilly today, so I won';t do that - not even to prove a point.

Damb. That was gona be my next request to prove it lol. Thanx Sera x

Seriously though. I think her ex may genuinely miss her. If you've been in a long term marriage, then lying next to someone for twenty-four years must leave a huge impression on the brain, especially since it sounds like she initiated the split.

I think it's simply a case of two people not realising what they've lost - until it's no longer there. If there is no closure, and the rows are still frequent, it is obvious that there is still the potential for reconcilliation, but they'd need to work on the issues.

I just wish people who had a differnet outlook on sexuality would add comment to this forum.

I could ask adarim why she's cheated on her 'serious' boyfriend with another man. But that's not my business.

I'm just wondering what support forums each of their respective new partners are seeking solace in?

Sera,

I have no problem answering that question. I certainly can NOT justify or excuse it, cheating is cheating. However, I will try and explain my thoughts at that time.

I cheated on my boyfriend because at the time I was in another world with my exhusband. We were talking about the kids and some of our issues and it got emotional. We both ended up with tears in our eyes and it just happened. At the time it felt like I was still his wife and he was my husband and we were consoleing each other cause were both hurt.

But in the light of day it was a VERY BAD idea because we hurt two people who know nothing about what happened (or hopefully never do) and in the long run ourselves as well.

It's not like we both went and had sex with some stranger, we are still legally husband and wife and I guess at that weak moment we didn't/couldn't/wouldn't see passed that.

Somehow at the time, it didn't seem like cheating because were still married. But at the end of the day it certainly is and ex sex or 24 yrs history does not make it right!

But by no means can it be compared to being on a street corner!!!!!