Child Support and Extras

Even a statement on the CSA website stating what CM money was intended to pay for would help.

Its such a grey area which causes a lot of grief for both parties.

because you don't get to control what your ex does? You wouldn't be happy if she commented on your new shoes, new car, new laptop,new phone etc. etc. and demanded to know how much they cost and why you hadn't purchased a cheaper model, would you?

And honestly, do you know whether or not your ex is saving for your children's futures?

mumtoboys wrote:

because you don't get to control what your ex does? You wouldn't be happy if she commented on your new shoes, new car, new laptop,new phone etc. etc. and demanded to know how much they cost and why you hadn't purchased a cheaper model, would you?

And honestly, do you know whether or not your ex is saving for your children's futures?

Quite.

Children are incredibly expensive, and that is with things that don't come under 'every day expenses'.

Herehere!

jaymdee wrote:

Even a statement on the CSA website stating what CM money was intended to pay for would help.

Its such a grey area which causes a lot of grief for both parties.

I don't think it is a grey area at all. Until recently the CSA website said that CM is a contribution towards the financial cost of raising a child. It now says;-

"child maintenance is regular, reliable financial support that helps towards a child's everyday living costs."

Everyday living costs include clothes, food, transport, toiletries, equipment, laundry, child care, replacing worn out furniture and bedding, stationary , housing, bills, haircuts, paying for damages, activities, presents etc etc. NRP's are entitled to a discount in the amount of CM paid because they are responsible for child's everyday living and the costs when the child is with them.

Firstly tell her you haven't got the money.
Then explain she is in receipt of child benefit tax credits and your csa payment and you ain't that's why you can't afford it.
If she gives you too much shxt over it you can always throw in well you'd better start charging lover boy a bit more rent.He knew your commitments when he was having an affair with ya.
They always come at it from the its for the kids angle and your responsibility.
Unfortunately although they plead poverty on the uniforms school dinners etc it's just to keep a pound note in their pocket.
I had it this week again off my ex New school blazer required making out she can't afford it or that she bought my daughters stuff so she feels I should buy this.She's out every other night of the week in the pub,meals out weekends away.Had a £300k divorce settlement £5000 a year tax free for the next 12 years after that and still has the front to ask for extra as if I haven't done enough already.I don't get hapenny off her in way of contribution for the kids.
It all depends on the circumstances some poor women genuinely need it,they'll be the ones who have been left by the old man no job 2/3 kids wrap around them living in poverty.
Other women don't need it at all they are the ones who have an affair bag the money move a new partner in anyway and are claiming every benefit going on top an all.
Your wife sounds like the 2nd type and they've go more front than a cows got .....udder.
Bet you thought I was gonna say xxxx Ruby
All the best
Pete

I get CSA payments full stop. Have a daughter at University and another about to go, having to pay deposit of £250 for Halls and had to pay for the transport to hike round looking at the universities.

Unfortunately I was made redundant at Christmas. I don't ask my x for a penny extra. He has started getting a taxable pension this month, so of course that will be added to his salary and CSA recalcuated. He will hate this, but he has no interest in the children now, well he never did have to be honest, so doesn't see them, cancelled their phones when I took him to court (and won) because he had stopped paying SM(ends in 2 years and I do not, will not extend it).

I have much too much pride to ask my x for any thing else. I am selling stuff on ebay to pay for the extras and our children know money is tight so are being very good.

Like Pete says your x has a new partner, let him flipping help.