Feeling Low and Depressed

Hi i have recently seperated from my wife, we have been married just short of 14yrs, we have been together for 19yrs, we have two childeren aged 9 and 12.
One of the main reasons for the marriage breakdown was my debt, i got into a problem with gambling and got into a bad situation with a lot of debt.
I have recently been arrested for harrassment and i am in court shortly.
I still love my wife dearly and want her back so much despite everything that has gone on. I cant seem to get through to her and have had a lot of interference from her sister.
I am suffering from stress and depression, i have been very close to killing myself on several occasions, but chicken out at the last minute.
everyday seems to get harder for me, i miss her so much, i dont know what to do, do i give her space and time and stop pushing or do i give up, this is a very difficult time for me i cant let go.

Simon

hi simon,
sounds like life's been pretty rough. hang in there. we all understand how you feel.
it sounds like you might need to give your wife a bit of space right now. maybe just try and focus on yourself at the moment.
maybe try and get yourself some support with councelling? I've gone and find it helps.
just try to make it a day at a time.
(hug)

Thanx for your words of support.
I have been to doctors and got some tablets and had a couple of good chats with him, i am in court tomorrow and doc has asked me to go back on tuesday for a chat and maybe arrange some councelling.
It is difficult and i cant seem to focus at all at the moment, it seems to get harder by the day. I only sleep a couple of hours a night.
I stumbled accross this site and hopefully can get some good advice and support from people in the same or similar stuation. friends dont seem to understand how i feel and their advice is a bit rubbish realy, i know they mean well but they dont realy help.

Thanx again

Hi sikon, yes most of us are in the same boat. It is a horrible situation to be in and often others close to yo don't understand.

Here you will find people who do understand are going through the same or similar things to you.

We are a very supportive bunch and fairly honest with each other about emotions etc. It does take a while to open up but once you do you will feel better for it. NO-one will judge you for being able to express your feelings and emotions honestly. You don't have to hide things like you have to so oftem with friends. No need for a brave face here. Most of us would see through it anyway. Chin up there is always someone here willing to listen and help

Take care and take one step at a time. This is a process and you will have to work with it. It takes time, the pain will still be there but it will start to lessen after a time.

hi Sikon

good luck for today...

you've admitted you've got a problem re gambling....it takes alot of courage to do that...now you need to work on that..if they offer counselling accept it, could be the help that you need.

re your ex, you do need to give her time, and yourself of course..

theres alot going on in your life at the moment and you cant rush things....

not sure if your wife wants contact it seems like no and everytime to try and contact and its denied you put yourself through so much pain....its not good for you...

try and think of yourself and getting through the days and nights.

its going to be hard but with family/friend/gp and wiki support we wil hopefully try and help you.

let us know the outcome from today.

good luck

daisy
xx

Hi sikon

Wecome to wiki u will get lots of help and support on here.

Totally agree with Daisy, u made big step admitting gambling summit u need help with so why not try counselling, its def helped me.

Also its right to give u and your wife space at mo, u need to sort things going on in your life for u, no-one else.She will just be protecting herself at mo from more hurt also and spect that why her sister got involved.

Its a really painful situation to deal with but if u really feel need to keep in touch with her try to keep it to outcome of court and that u getting help for problems and checking she ok. That way she won't feel u making any demands on her but will know u still care.

U r lucky to have supportive GP, accept all help he can give and keep coming on here for our support.

Take care, best of luck for today

Scared x

Dont realy know how to take today realy, court case got adjourned for reports so new date is 4th august, however the day took a turn for the worst, when leaving court i was confronted by two police officers who re-arrested me and took me in, this time my wifes sister has been and put a complaint in against me saying i have been harassing her too, i have evidence to prove that she has been harassing me and i have only responded to her, but unfortunately until investigations are carried out i was hit again with bail conditions, which again are over the top.
This situation just seems to keep getting worse and worse for me i am at the end of a tether right now and dont know where to turn or what to do, the last week has been hard enough but now this.

I blame the wifes sister for a lot of the way the wife is treating me and her attitude, and have proof that she is a major factor, but now this, how can i settle and try and cope with her cousing me more problems, everybody seems to be against me at the moment and are trying to take me down.

I miss my wife so much and love her so much but others keep trying to put obstacles in our way. I dont think i can take much more i am broken, everytime i seem to be turning a corner a brick wall pops up and i smash into it.