should his lifestyle be downgraded to support kids

Thought I'd start a bit of a debate here..I dont think it will get me anywhere in the long run.
OK my ex claims not to be working...he tells CSA he doesnt have an income...and yet manages to uphold an enviable lifestyle...him and his wife have a new-ish car each...they live with their child in a 6 bed house, ex has the "ultimatate" sky tv package (everything included)..they have "100's of games for their wii as opposed to our 3 games (kids say Daddy has XXX and XXX games)...and they insist on at least 2 foreign and 1 UK holiday a year...yet I get no CM from him for our 2 kids...
Should, in your opinions...he be made to downgrade his lavish lifestyle to support his kids or is he within his rights to live as he does, provide luxury for the kid he has with his wife whilst his other 2 live on the breadline?
Lou x
PS...the new 6 bed house was purchased when his accountant claimed to the CSA that he was earning £104 a week....which is why the criminal compliance case is going on.
Also, I have an urge to paint "XXX who lives here pays no child support for the 2 kids you see here every other weekend as he claims to have no money....haha...see what his neighbours think of that!

I meant to say I'd love to paint that on his double garage door!!!

Hi Lou,

Although he has a 6 - bed house, flash cars, materialistic stuff and holidays (which really much pee you off while you struggle)

Its not what he has, its what he doesn't provide for your kids - and the lavish lifestyle proves he can afford it.

He has a responsibility (and should want) to support your 2 kids.

When you challenge him, avoid seeming envious - but make the point that he should be providing financial support for his kids.

Its not that you don't want him to have a footballers lifestyle, you want him to have a footballers lifestyle AND take responsibility financially to support your children.

Its sad that adults play these 'I have no money' games, when we clearly know they have - you want whats fair for your young uns and he has a responsibility.

Why he can't see this beggers belief.

(apart from fuel & food) all my b/f salary goes to his ex & kids.

I feel proud that although we have bugger all money to do stuff with, he's the type of bloke who stays by his responsibilities. Who could love someone who diddles their children out of financial support.

There are people who have low incomes and give what little they do get to support their kids. It sounds like he has plenty.

I just don't understand ...............

WR
x

May I add some ex wive claim to be destitute my ex got a 75% share of house(large 4 bed, not needed for her and 2 kids) kept all posessions(never even got a tea spoon) as she had me evicted on a bunch of lies, and as soon as house was transfered to her name put in a new kitchen. This is the woman who takes home £800 per month wages, and all the usual benefits. So I dont need to say any more. Oh and is constantly chasing me for more money.

Hi HMP,

Yes, the 'lies' about finances go both ways - you will be able to see the unfairness in this regardless of the situation/gender of the liar.

WR

Well my ex diddled me and the kids out of our family home into rented accomodation and then rented out our beautiful family home before buying him and his then gf, now wife their very lovely home.
So, my ex's 2 oldest kids live in a rented house, have never been on an aeroplane and live life very frugally whilst his youngest kid lives in a beautiful house, has flown abroad more times than I've had hot dinners and I dont think he's 2 yet!
Tell you what really upset me and that was putting his address into google street maps (he lives 3 hours away from us)...it wasn't even envy I felt it was "how could he have done this to us and manage to live like this without shame?".
...and so this takes me to another question...why do they (some of the people who leave, not all) have this "Oh for gods sake I'm entitled to happiness, be happy for me, look heres my new gf / bf.." attitude...where is their shame? Why do they feel no shame, guilt or sympathy?
Lou x

Lou,
What was your exes line of work?I'm needing a career change.
There is no law that can help you as you were not married.
He is only responsible for paying you child maintenance from his wages.
I suppose that he must have had significant money saved in accounts you did not know about to be funding this lifestyle now.You would not have a claim on these savings as you were not married.
Has he ever explained to you why he is so adamant in his refusal to pay anything to the upkeep of your two children together.
All the best
Pete xx