never thought Iwould be on wikivorce

Hi Nature girl
Indeed ... I still fantasize about revenge though..but that 's all it is just a fantasy; and as long as it remains just that,I do feel better once I am back into "the real world"...
What I really wish for is that "the coward"(my husband) gets what he truly deserves whatever that may be.. good or dare I say,BAD.....
Roxie

Hi Roxie

I hope you get a fair end to it all. I know it is really hard to accept that someone you invested such a large part of your life in can walk away and ruin what you built together, guess that is why judges look at the whole picture, so they can compensate losses to some extent. The bigger the investment, the harder it is to accept I guess, if it was a business it would have devasting affects, there should be a 'duty of care' added in to the marriage vows, lol.

Hi Brunswick
I will admit that as I am not technically experienced with computers and definately even less with sites like this one ,I tend to wonder each time if a message is really addressed to me ?...
Particularly when it starts with" "loved you post "..
In any case I will assume that such is the case.
I always think that my story is rather unbelievable /boring /tedious and all the rest...Hence the fact that I haven't elaborated thus far ....
I am glad that you appear to be feeling better after what sounds a difficult time for you.
Rightly or not ,I have decided that whatever "the other one " thinks is no longer a matter for me to be interested/concerned with...Once again my little statements make me feel a little bit better .
Roxie

Hi nature girl,
Yes... everything IS HARD....
However from day one I thought that "the coward" ruined my life as I knew it was , as I planned it was going to be.
Nevertheless,I decided , very early into this mess that I was not going to allow him to ruin my life from the day he left.
Easier said than done ...
I have accepted almost immediatelly that it was over .
What I have not , cannot accept is that he will dictate the rest of my life by his initial actions.
I am glad to say that in that field I HAVE THE POWER TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE.
Lets hope that I can do it . I have to think :one day at a time . Slowly but surely...
These kind of banalities use to insense me not too long ago but now ... they make sence ,to me anyway.
Roxie

Roxie

It's great that you have such a positive attitude to it all. Remember that is is only your life so far, that is what I've built on since my tbx went, even though I'm older, I've still got some happiness left to find in many different ways.

Here's to better days to come for you Roxie

NGirly

Hi nature girl
I find it strange that somebody thinks that my attitude to this mess ( I LIKE to refer to my situation as such)is "positive".
I always think that I am rather the "negative" type.....
I am also, what I consider "older" and things seem to have a certain "urgency" ...
I feel that if you are young you can recover from things better because well .. let's face it : time is on your side.
Then , out of nowhere I think.. nothing should be timed per say ...
I am determined to be happy again.
In my dark moments I wonder ... Can you make yourself be happy ? Or .. does it always happened because or thanks to somebody else?...Roxie

Roxie,

My message was sent to mumtoboys so I hope I did not offend. I feel for you.

My wife left me and my two boy's (13 and 15) at Xmas without warning after 18yrs together. She met someone at work moved out the marital home for 4 months and has now moved back into the local area (almost on my doorstep) with him. Believe me I have been through every "roller-coaster" emotion you can imagine but I want you to know it does get better very slowly.

My wife has lost everything and must now lie in the bed she made. The boys and I are still hurt, angry and upset but life must go on and my focus is completely on their happiness and stability. They are old enough to understand what has happened and want very little contact with their Mum who is struggling with their rejection of her.

I am sure my life will get better. I have met someone although it is very early stages at the moment and I want to take things slowly.

Be strong - right always wins at the end of the day

Brunswick.