When will it end!

Meant to add too that she got all she wanted throughout the marriage and sat on her arse reading Mills and Boon, never did housework and he looked after the children.
She only worked the last couple of years of their marriage, her choice, she did not want to, but wanted it all anyway.
She is used to dictating the situation and the pattern has to stop now otherwise she will always be in the shadows.
zara

Just by talking to you lot makes things seem a lot clearer and keeps me a lot more sane. I keep saying that he needs to talk to her but he has tried sit down negotiations, email negotiations, telephone negotiations and they all just end up breaking down.

I have told him about this website and I think it will put his mind at ease when he can talk to some other like minded people.

Hi Boredstiff

Just to say that your partners ex sounds exactly like my partners ex. Using the children as ammo etc etc etc. Unfortunately this has now gone on for him for 10 years. I sincerely hope that yours is settled sooner.

Rise above and try hard not to become too emotionally involved - support him when you can but at the end of the days it's HIS divorce and you must not let it come between you and your relationship, easier said than done but you must try.

I have gone overboard in supporting my partner over the years but now realise it is for him to sort not me. We make sure that we don't discuss the horrible situation all of the time and actually after a solicitors visit say to each other that we will have 10 minutes discussing and then no more, otherwise it eats into your lives too much and you end up living and breathing it.

Try to stay focussed - it won't be forever. I too like control and like to get things sorted asap but others (ie his ex) are simply not like that so you need to accept it and not fight something that you really can't fight otherwise it eats away at you.

Some exes (like my partners) just refuse to get on and get a life of their own and become obsessed with causing trouble for their ex, don't let her get to you.

Take care - hope some of this made sense - I am not good at explaining but boy have I been through it!

Ness x

She works from home but does about 1 hours work a day then sits and buys off ebay all day.

Thanks Ness, I can't believe you have been through TEN YEARS of this greif. I best take a deep breath then as I know this is goign to be dragging on for years to come. i think my other half is goign to get ill over this.

Could she get a cut in our new house that we have bought together??

Good for her - don't let it bother you

The times I have wanted to give my partners ex a piece of my mind but have not because you lower yourselves to their level then. I have received the most evil texts over the years but have never replied, it's been very hard not to, I have typed it but never sent it

Vent your anger on here but please don't let it come between you and your man.

Ness x

Hi boredstiff
Hate to say it but possibly. It all just depends there are so many factors in what is considered as the marital pot.
I am sure someone here will be able to advise you further on that.



and

Nessinoo

Ditto to how we have been. Why cant ex wives just get on with their lives. I think the most outrageous part is they are so happy to use their children and ammo, you are right.
It is almost, I did not want him, but you AIN'T gonna be happy together either. Just because they were once married to them they think they have the god given right to poke their noses in. GET A LIFE that is what I say.
zara