Tracking your wife's car and text messages

I feel sorry for you. Its a horrible feeling knowing your partner has betrayed you. But once you have this unshakeable proof she's had an affair, what exactly are you going to do with it? Run around all your friends and family with a big notice saying 'see, I told you so', you can't go on a rallying cry, or some great campaign proclaiming yourself the innocent hurt party. It isn't going to get you a whole lot of sympathy. Well it might initially, and then it'll be a case of - sorry mate, we're bored with that now.
It doesn't affect peoples life the way it affects yours. I found the best way to deal with it was a bit a dignity. Have it out, make it clear you know whats going on, you're not putting up with it, and get the hell out.

You will both pay financially, and that will be the next axe to grind, another battle to win. Meanwhile she'll be happy with someone else and you will still be trying to find the way to get one over on her. It won't happen. Her thoughts will be elsewhere and you will be consumed with having revenge.

The previous posters are right, stop now before it eats you alive.

Do not expect support for yourself when the other party admits to an affair. Regardless of fault in my experience your family is your family, her family hers, your friends are yours and here firends hers - the only ones that have a problem are joint ones.

Good luck and look for support from ehre and yourself.

wilsr10 wrote:

Do not expect support for yourself when the other party admits to an affair. Regardless of fault in my experience your family is your family, her family hers, your friends are yours and here firends hers - the only ones that have a problem are joint ones.

Good luck and look for support from ehre and yourself.

I've read this thread as the wife whose husband was having an affair. This is the most helpful reply I've seen from my own experience.
My husband's family thought he was awful for doing this - for a couple of weeks. But blood is thicker than water.
Some joint friends dropped us both - most took a side (usually mine to be fair)

Where you are lucky is ther eare no kids to be damaged by this. If you know she has cheated and you don't trust her why stay? If you choose to stay you better choose to turn a blind eye for a long time - as I think I did.

Good luck but make a good choice.

If you love them set them free...if they dont come back they were not yours to have!

Do agree with Elle completely....
You either let her continue with her other life, or, if you cant do that, separate.
You do need to take a step back. This surveilence stuff you ask about makes you sound like a bit of a basket case.
Accept her ways or split.
Sorry for sounding so blunt. Am wound up because my pc is messed up and took me 2 hours to get online.
All he best, Fade x

Blunt? Honest?

The surveillance makes me look like a basket case:

How much of a basket case would you feel if you were cheated on? There's a blunt question/answer from me!
So I don't feel one inch bad for doing it.

There will always be people here who agree with what I'm doing and there will be those that won't. I need to know, I have my own reasons for it, that is why I'm doing it.

April Baby, no I won't need to run around and tell everyone, that's not my style but I'm sure some would. If anyone asked and only then would I say what happened.
Close people would have found out one way or the other anyway and I'm not after sympathy either, read further below why.

With the friends, family etc thing..... I have been divorced before, many years ago and I came out to be the one who did bad.. no I didn't cheat but I was seen by family (who are now OK about everything) and by friends mine as well as hers as well as mutual as the one who did the wrong.
This is why I don't want to go down that road again, it's just as painful finding out who really is your friend and who isn't, people you thought you can rely on, people who you thought would support you.
But friends aside, it took me some time to get my family to accept things and me again and I don't wish to go through that again.
So the word "Family is family" depends on what sort of family you have, some are luckier than others.

I hear what you are all saying that just get it over and done with and go if I'm not happy but having been there before I'm trying to save myself from the after mirth of it all.

I'm sure some will agree to what I've written and some won't, all replies are very welcome and some have been really helpful to my case.

Cheers,

GD