On the verge

Seeing the estate agent at 4.30 today so fingers crossed. i dont know how long it will be though to have access so i'll crash at the office if needed. I'm positive having contact now will be the worst thing to do so will stay away. at least i can talk to my son and keep him updated on how its going.
what a day !

Children have a habit of saying what the adult wants to hear in these situations because they are confused and want to please both of you. This is where you have to be the adult and realise they are still children. You both have a responsibility to make sure both the children feel loved and that none of this is their fault.

Try to stay positive and not back down or send her mixed signals, it's good she has a friend going to see her.

My son has always been closer to me and i was the one who stayed up every night during teething, illness and have been more involved throughout his life.

I have discussed this with him as he noticed things werent right and also that she ignores him a lot.

He has felt rejected at times and told me that she doesnt seem to be bothered with him.

i just hope i can survive this as i feel like i'm drowning right now.
everything is spinning round my head with banks rent council tax bills direct bedits and changing them and all that crap.

well, you won't drown alone because you've found this site!
You sound like a good Dad so you will take account of your childrens feeelings.

I have spent over an hour on the phone to the gas/electric company trying to sort out the direct debit etc. It's so time consuming but necessary, also difficult when you're crying!!!

Things will be difficult for you for a while because you will go through lots of emotions and it's early days but keep posting and we will keep replying X

I can't thank everyone enough. Just being able to tell someone whats happening is a help.
Just had a message from my son to say shes taking them to her dads for a bit. I'm a bit concerned for him but he seems ok to go and it will the best thng she can do. Hopefully having support from family will help her realise that its time to let go and it takes two make a marriage work.
I havent eaten all day but just feel sick at the thought of food right now.
I know theres so much to do with the finances and all but i cant think straight enough to talk to them at the moment.
I just need to survive today and if can sleep hopefully it will help things seem clearer.
Thanks again and have a tissue on me angeldust.

thanks for the tissue

Don't worry about financial stuff yet, it's too soon. There will be plenty of time for that later.
Good luck with the estate agent, hope you get a moving in date very soon.
Just take things as they come and try not to think too far into the future (that's my downfall!)
Keep posting, Teresa

So sorry you are going through this mess.

Be prepared for your stbx to be weepy and then very angry with you. Keep contact to a minimum its much less painful all round.

I went through hell when my ex left for someone else, and I was the one who asked for a separation before I even knew he had someone else!

Better now, but we haven't sorted out the money yet. My sons 14 and 17 aren't really bothered about seeing their Dad which saddens me, though they do play football with him once a week.