help to get house back

Flying horse,

I too was wondering if he has a PD of some kind. What do you mean when he gets ''ill''? I know you said before that he took to his bed. That behaviour is rather unusual....

Wondering if Livingmylife has a point here about a non-molestation order. I too think this is emotional abuse, it is definitely control. I guess a non mol order would only be granted if things escalated though and you need to stay safe. But say for sample things did escalate and you put a non mol order in place, by default he would surely have to leave your home....?

Have you tried contacting a domestic abuse helpline to get any help? Just wondered if they would be able to advise?

Whether he has PD or not is debatable, he obviously does not have a formal diagnosis or on medication. What he is, is a manipulative person who has perfected a pattern of behaviour to suit his needs and the ability to play the victim.

This is a man who should NOT have a gun licence, he is a potential danger to all who encounter him, both now and in the future.

You will all remember what happened in the north of England, he was also a man with a gun licence that had been displaying mental health illness traits, which were ignored.

The reason I say this is, flying horse has expressed fears about broaching the topic of splitting up. This man is not going to behave in a predictable manner and she needs the protection of the law.

We have all asked her to speak to the police and yes his gun licence will be revoked, as it should. For so many reasons, going to the police is the best course of action.

Take care Flying horse, we are all concerned for your emotional and physical health.

NWTT.

Agree totally with not ring an abuse helpline speak to the police you do not want his behaviour to be allowed to escalate.........
Is it possible he has done this sort of thing before......
Lots of love make sure you stay safe......

Hi I don''t know if he has done this before, He had a relationship with a woman 20 years younger for several years and is still friends with their family but I have never met them. I did however find this girl''s bank details on a piece of paper - so whether he owes her money I don''t know. He had a relationship with a woman down in Southampton he is still angry about. Apparently he owned his house then and she moved into his and he had trouble getting her out. She went to police and told them he had threatened her with a gun. He said when the police came round her description of the gun was all wrong and she had made it up. He then "shopped" her to the DSS later apparently and went to court and laughed when she was "done" for fraud. I am not sure what he is, he has friends in the police and in fact trains them - or so he says. He is an instructor, says ex para officer. Cant say too much more because of i.d. I am not sure how "real" his moods are; that is weird itself. Change very quickly which makes me feel more of a cold, manipulation. He cant stop lying though and is in at least £22,000 debt that I have discovered, £11,000 of that not being paid in any way. He told me no debt; He has not directly threatened me though and goes on about men who abuse woman and how he has always protected woman and how men isolate women etc. like he is against it big time. I just tried to speak to Sol who was out, letting him know I hope to go on THur. Advising him that I think process server willneed to hand deliver notice as he just does not open things he does not want to see.

Flyhorse

Where does he keep the guns? If he has moved them to your house he should have informed the local firearms department of them moving to your house. This way a marker would be placed on your address to show that there are guns present at this address.

If they ar not at this address then where does he keep them? Have you actually seen the guns or could this be one of his many lies to continue to intimidate you.

I cannot imagine that he trains the police. He sounds like a complete idiot living in fantasy land and preys on vulnerable people who are in fear of his status.

A call to your local police station would be advisable. If he is truthful in that he works for the police, the last thing he will want is work knowing his personal issues.

If he is away this week, pack all his things and when he is gone ring him to let him know he is no longer welcome at your address. I suspect his behaviour is due to the fact that he knows the relationship is on its last legs.

Do not believe a word he says and do not be intimidated. Police take these things very seriously these days especially if he,does have a firearms license.

Hi having just read your post i am seriously concerned and it is possible that the women were in the same position as you and he just moves from one vctim to the next it is possible this is a pattern
the good thing is you have discovered this quickly less than six months and you are doing something about it you are right make sure you ge a process server may cost more in the short term but evrything dotted and crossed that way.........the good thing is if he has no money he cant fight a legl action as no legal aid really either!!!!!!!!!
i still would report the matter to the police at least then it stops him making fase allegations about yo to try and stay in the house sadly if he is as manipulative as he sounds you need to be ahead of the game......
stay strong lots of love

No his guns are legit, they are in my house which is part of why I cant just throw him out also sol says as as we are living together there are laws to follow now ; he gives me 380 per month (full incl.) so I am giving him a months notice, he has cats as well and guns and upteen computers for his work so not like a bag I can just chuck out. I am taking friend with me when I leave to witness house when I leave especially his stuff. in case he tries saying I have damaged it. THe firearms officer visited him at my house after he moved here, all very matey. He is currently awaiting his new license they have to renew every 5 years. I have found out that under new recommendations applicants for guns should not have financial problems, I have proof of his, I have photocopied allthe bills he put in the bin. I will go to the police with these if he does not move out by the end of the month I am giving him. He has job as director with firm near London, that is true, but he is so broke he is using payday loan co''s to get by.