help to get house back

Glad to have the update, but wish it was going more smoothly.

Your posting is such an eye opener and a lesson for us readers - who would have thought it so difficult to get someone out of your own home after such a short time. You know what I bet this is not the first time he has pulled this trick.

Anyway, don''t rush to get that bath fixed and make him comfortable.

Keep us posted. Good luck, stay strong. Nige

Oh Lord Flyinghorse!

Just when you thought this guy couldn''t get any more charming! Well, I guess it would explain a lot. You are not going to know yourself once he finally leaves!

Do make sure you keep close tabs on your finances once he goes, I have a strong suspicion that he may dabble in a bit of fraud to tide him over.

As for the drug thing and framing you, I would take some discrete advice on this. Asking the police to search your house may leave you wide open as he could say anything and make things up about you.

Hope it all goes OK for you,

EA

When he goes make sure that the is still not using your address.

First husband moved out but then ''rented out'' the address to someone so that they could get their benefit claim paid to it so they didnt screw up another friends housing benefit by admiting living there.

He used to let himself in (as at that point he was still on deeds did not change locks...) on benefit day to pick up the cheque for the guy - post came after I went to work. If I hadnt been off sick would not have found out.

The world is full of such wonderful people, may he never RIP ......

downland, I want to say unbelieveable but really I now would believe just about anything. I will change locks, I joined experion so I could keep an eye on my credit rating. I changed all my cards/details, informed the companies so got new cards at my parents address; after informing companies what was going on. I have thought about just going to d.v. unit at police and telling them the whole lot, get him arrested and out, guns and all. He has said that he has "done paperwork" for a house, god knows what that means. His precious gun licence is my only lever. Other plan is I move back in on Thursday/Friday next week with annoying friends and relatives. I want very much to warn others about NOT letting anyone move into their house. Just do not do it. If I wanted ever to live with anyone ever again - and this is most unlikely then I would say get flat/bedsit nearby, and only let them come with overnight bag. It is unreal, I had a lodger before paying same "rent". No marital extras ! he had no rights. But if they pay you rent and you sleep with them, then apparently they have some rights. Unreal. Law is getting very fudged due to so many living together and some wanting same rights for co-habs. Personally I think if you want rights get married, if you want freedom and self responsibility then don''t. The good bit is that by moving away I have untangled any emotional involvement (however sick) and now just see him and the situation for how it is. whereas before for some reason I felt sorry for him and a bit guilty for making him have to move. Now know this is pretty indicative of emotional/mental abuse . Thanks again for support from this sight. Have been reading around. Why do we bother !!! Apart from him I am enjoying seeing friends and getting my life back together.

Whoops I mean site !

Hi Flyinghorse,

If you are concerned about abusive relationships and the patterns that they perpetuate, feel free to look up a very good book that I always recommend, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship by Beverley Engel.

EA

Dear All, and especial thanks to Mitchum, Nowhere to turn and lying cheat ! and everyone who has spent time supporting me here. I had e mail Wednesday, he is moving out on Friday, hysterical he says "I will be leaving by 23.59 on the 17th May. He will not be cleaning the house he says as I had not bothered to mend the hot water.

I am going to my house to see on Saturday morning, I am already feeling so much better and lighter.

It really is not a good idea to let someone move into your house if you own it, or nearly own it or whatever; the law is no longer as clear as it was. If he had been there say two years, chances are he could have got longer occupancy and likely beneficial interest: So if you have lodger on lodger agreement paying say £350 per month and you want them out, takes one month, change locks, bobs your uncle. Move in boyfriend/girlfriend/lover , they pay you £350 per month and get to share your bed, move their cats in etc., then they can get beneficial interest, know this is basic and sorry to be so unromantic. Will post on Monday if all goes well. THANK YOU ALL AGAIN IT HAS BEEN SO HELPFUL, in many ways.
FH.