Hello I feel so stupid....

The other thing she said is i need to know how much is in the joint account, what bills we pay etc.

I did say jokingly have you lost the use of your fingers, there are two cash machines in the village from which you can find out how much is in the joint account etc.

I feel really sad thinking about this knwo is I went back amicable last night, I wasn't expecting to be jumping into bed with her. She is pushing me away so much and then int he next breath she wants me to run around and organise everything for her.

It hurts so much, my heart is leaping in my chest so much now its hurting, Why? because i am thinking of the little things she does that make me want to reach out and hold her, how she would shake her bum when i would say " Wow you make those jeans look good".

I have just sadi to some here they asked me if I could ever see myself with anyone else and I said my dieing breath would be "I have always loved you Mrs Pleo"

I was thinking of her this morning driving to work, and my phone beeped she had sent me an email.

Damn this hurts so much.

I feel as though she would really like me to be back at home, but i get the impression that someone has sadi to her "Once he is out keep him out the clock is ticking"

If i wasnt the guy i am can she leagally keep me out of a house that is in joint names? She even threatend to leave if i tried to pull that one again, it felt really strongly like i was being emotianlly blackmailed and especially when she said she would take the girls also.

Unbelievably hard, but try to stay consistent with your message - don't rise to her threats etc, just keep telling her where you want things to end up. You sounds a very loyal person and there are your children to think of too, so I guess for the moment it is just down to you to keep hope alive for your marriage. Not really fair but if it works then it is worth it.

Wanting you to run around and organise things is very different from wanting you in her life properly. It is encouraging that she has agreed to accompany you to counselling but make sure that she is being open about her thoughts too. She sounds very confused at the moment, maybe needs reassurance, but you need that too and it has to be a two-way thing in the end, even if you are happy to be the conciliatory, forgiving one at the moment.

Hang on in there and I hope the counselling goes well. x

Pleo

She can't keep you out of the house legally unless there is a court order which would be granted if there was abuse going on.

So you can go there when you please....the thing you need to balance is the extent to which you exercise your rights and the extent to which you play things softly softly! It sounds like she needs space, you steaming in saying that you are legally entitled to be there will not endear you to her....equally you staying away too long may make her think you don't care..... you are between a rock and a hard place! What is important now is that you let her know how you feel and you demonstrate that you understand how she feels.

S

One more day then my angels are coming to see me!

I am so excited.

Two days of fun fun fun, dont know what we are doing yet, I was going to plan that tomorrow afternoon.

Only thing that troubles me is can i get the travel cot and push chair in my small run about?

God bless you P

Jo x

I am very nervous about tomorrow now!
How can i explain to my wife that i think she is being unreasonable by saying I am not welcome in our home!?!?

I am not thinking about my self here but the children, they are only young and I have always been there and I find it very difficult to not be there.

This is bad bad mind games, my parents have been great but they are going on holiday next week and will be back next weekend. My father has expressed the point that I cant stay there for ever, indicating to me that he wants me out after next weekend.

I want to be back home, I am not there during the day there is a sofa for me to lay my head.

Part of me thinks it is very convient for me to not be there then "friends" can be contactable at any time for her.

Yes i will admit it I feel really down, and deep down feel like a cheap and eager babysitter, "yeah good old pleomax, I have kicked him out, and if i keep him out he will be so desperate for the children that he will take them anytime and i can be free to do what ever".

How would she feel if the roles were reviersed? I bet she would be doing everything inculding calling her dad to come sort me out so she could be with the children.

This is so one sided, I have faults and will admit to them, I am not a rapist, nor a child molester, I have never threathened her or the children WHY CANT I BE IN OUR HOUSE!!!!!

And with her bieng so controlling she is nagging me to tell her what is going on with my job search and what money is in the bank etc........

Seems she dosent want me there but wants me to tell her what is going on and have me on the end of a teather.

I am so frustrated!!!! With the whole thing!

Pleo at his lowest!