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Jokes and Humour 430 topics

A place to share any jokes or humourous stuff with your wiki buddies.

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Subject	Replies /	Latest
Warning - dark humour! The Dark Side Of Women... > > A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the first sh ... 28 Jan 10, by Bulletproof Latest 29 Jan 10 by Ursa Major 1 2	Replies:7 :972	Latest by Ursa Major 29 Jan 10
Help!Haway! Further to my last post.I was just wondering if you could all have a whip round to help me pay the ex harridan's tax free holiday fund this month.45000 members ... 29 Jan 10, by hawaythelads Latest 29 Jan 10 by Itgetsbetter 1 2	Replies:9 :977	Latest by Itgetsbetter 29 Jan 10
Tell youre ex misus you've had a £10k wage cut!!! Today. I had to tell my ex misus that as I had been given the wonderful new year gift of a £10k wage cut this would effect the child maintenance by a whopp ... 28 Jan 10, by hawaythelads Latest 29 Jan 10 by kezzarick 1 2	Replies:12 :882	Latest by kezzarick 29 Jan 10
There is a God!!!!!!!!! I have just visited the 'forbidden place' known to others as my spare bedroom! I clambered over the mountain of junk in hot persiut of a different pair of shoes ... 28 Jan 10, by vivi36 Latest 28 Jan 10 by Jollyrocket	Replies:6 :461	Latest by Jollyrocket 28 Jan 10
Human bed warmers Don't know if this a wind up but apparently Holiday Inn are employing HUMAN BED WARMERS who spend 5 mins in your bed to warm it up PRIOR to you getting in! ... 27 Jan 10, by ldg Latest 27 Jan 10 by DancingButterfly	Replies:4 :595	Latest by DancingButterfly 27 Jan 10
brad and angie breaking up So wow, there you go ladies and gents, two of the beautiful people are on the market again... ... 24 Jan 10, by realdad Latest 24 Jan 10 by MontyPython	Replies:6 :499	Latest by MontyPython 24 Jan 10
made me chuckle Q: Why are hurricanes named after women? A: Because when they come, they're wild and wet, and when they go they take your house and car with them 18 Dec 09, by Michael_W Latest 22 Jan 10 by hawaythelads 1 2	Replies:7 :871	Latest by hawaythelads 22 Jan 10
Blonde Logic A Blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon arrival, a concerned St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates. 'I'm sorry, 'St Peter said; 'But Heaven is suffering fro ... 15 Jan 10, by nbm1708 Latest 20 Jan 10 by rubytuesday	Replies:1 :378	Latest by rubytuesday 20 Jan 10
New profile pic Came across this lovely pic of me and the ex harridan on our wedding day we were so happy 19 Jan 10, by hawaythelads Latest 20 Jan 10 by Boo2u21964 1 2	Replies:8 :887	Latest by Boo2u21964 20 Jan 10
Handover of kids this morning. The greatest thing about my ex misus picking up the kids from my flat is that there is an intercom system an outside door a hallway a flight of stairs another h ... 11 Jan 10, by hawaythelads Latest 13 Jan 10 by Grim2332 1 2 3	Replies:17 :1259	Latest by Grim2332 13 Jan 10
It's Complicated For anyone out there feeling down the movie just out with Meryl Streep, Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin 'It's Compplicated' will make you smile. I went to see it ... 12 Jan 10, by Poppie	Replies:0 :352
Relationship Audit Just noticed the divorcesupermarket.com sale. Relationship Audit, dow ... 11 Jan 10, by Soldierbluenomore Latest 11 Jan 10 by Soldierbluenomore	Replies:2 :362	Latest by Soldierbluenomore 11 Jan 10
News Just in from Sweden < ... 07 Jan 10, by Maysie01 Latest 07 Jan 10 by notdavid 1 2	Replies:8 :885	Latest by notdavid 07 Jan 10
Wiki lettuce of the year.. Come on, what was your favourite lettuce? I have had so many lovely lettuces BUT the heart of Romaine that I had on Xmas day with my cold turkey might just get ... 05 Jan 10, by Lucretia Latest 06 Jan 10 by Elle 1 2 3	Replies:16 :1270	Latest by Elle 06 Jan 10
Have you heard this one? She married him because he was such a "strong man" She divorced him because he was such a "dominating male." He married her bec ... 04 Jan 10, by Bunnygirl Latest 04 Jan 10 by Bunnygirl	Replies:3 :492	Latest by Bunnygirl 04 Jan 10
Lawyer Jokes These were recorded verbatim and published by Court Reporters that had the torment of staying calm and remaining professional while these exchanges were actuall ... 04 Sep 09, by Marshy_ Latest 04 Jan 10 by Bunnygirl	Replies:6 :508	Latest by Bunnygirl 04 Jan 10
I find it funny! I should actually be very angry which I am but cannot stop laughing at what X2B ahs put down on forms C2 and C1A I dont give my children food. I hide key to ... 30 Dec 09, by ssoria Latest 01 Jan 10 by jjenkins1	Replies:2 :351	Latest by jjenkins1 01 Jan 10
In the spirit of Christmas lol I was bored.... hope my version makes you smile 24 Dec 09, by Kimmi Latest 01 Jan 10 by jjenkins1	Replies:4 :349	Latest by jjenkins1 01 Jan 10
Correct a mistake .... A minister and lawyer were chatting at a party: "What do you do if you make a mistake on a case?" the minister asked. "Try to fix it if it's big; ... 31 Dec 09, by mummybear38 Latest 31 Dec 09 by nbm1708	Replies:1 :346	Latest by nbm1708 31 Dec 09
HAPPY BIRTHDAY POPPIE ! ... 22 Dec 09, by GeJay Latest 22 Dec 09 by Kimmi	Replies:6 :417	Latest by Kimmi 22 Dec 09
I'm off up north for christmas!!! Right wish me luck.i could be gone some time.I am about to leave the higher civilisation that is South London to venture up North for the Crimbo festivities. 21 Dec 09, by hawaythelads Latest 21 Dec 09 by lovelorn_maiden	Replies:4 :307	Latest by lovelorn_maiden 21 Dec 09
Inspiration at xmas!!!Hallelujah!!! Without doubt divorce is a very troubling and depressing scenario. I am well aware that there are many mentally well balanced and intelligent people who can ... 21 Dec 09, by hawaythelads Latest 21 Dec 09 by ladylou	Replies:2 :426	Latest by ladylou 21 Dec 09
Gordon Brown Stole Christmas This video is by David O'Connor, brother to Matt O'Connor who set up F4J, and it features some old F4J members. Enjoy: 15 Dec 09, by Forseti Latest 15 Dec 09 by Ephelia	Replies:1 :368	Latest by Ephelia 15 Dec 09
facy a chat..... ... 11 Dec 09, by wazo Latest 11 Dec 09 by Elle 1 2 3 ... 8	Replies:51 :2892	Latest by Elle 11 Dec 09
A nice little xmas joke! got this one in my emails, hope you like it! There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegib ... 30 Nov 09, by arker Latest 02 Dec 09 by arker	Replies:4 :283	Latest by arker 02 Dec 09
And You thought you had problems Just flicking through the cable channels and on pops Jerry Springer.It's one of the more intellectual programmes I watch. Anyway this bloke announces i'm on ... 30 Nov 09, by hawaythelads Latest 02 Dec 09 by hawaythelads	Replies:6 :313	Latest by hawaythelads 02 Dec 09
Well Well No Chat!! Ian what has happened? Been away for a while. No Chat??? what has happened? I was looking forward to that. Zara xx ... 28 Nov 09, by Zara2009 Latest 28 Nov 09 by Shezi	Replies:1 :301	Latest by Shezi 28 Nov 09
Jokes A dietitian was addressing a large audience in Chicago: "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. ... 11 Nov 09, by dukey Latest 16 Nov 09 by megan09	Replies:1 :362	Latest by megan09 16 Nov 09
My solicitor neighbour I don't mind solicitors , honest . I got one for a neighbour. He said to me the other day "I am a better man than you " I said "I never s ... 13 Nov 09, by changedman	Replies:0 :285
Happy wedding anniversary Haway!!! Was just watching the footie and realised today was me wedding anniversary. Fook me if I'd known how expensive a day that was really gonna be.I would've leg ... 08 Nov 09, by hawaythelads Latest 09 Nov 09 by Kimmi	Replies:6 :313	Latest by Kimmi 09 Nov 09
Negotiating made me laugh - </div> <div class="started"> 08 Nov 09, by <span class="kwho-moderator">Tets</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div id="klastpostphone" class="visible-phone"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/160467-negotiating#160503" title="Thats funny wish i did that when married to my ex knowing what i know now lol , he hated the dentist!:laugh:" rel="canonical">Latest</a> 08 Nov 09 by <span class="kwho-user">muchtoomuch</span> <div class="pull-right"> </div> </div> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">2</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">366</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/160467-negotiating#160503" title="Thats funny wish i did that when married to my ex knowing what i know now lol , he hated the dentist!:laugh:" rel="canonical">Latest</a> by <span class="kwho-user">muchtoomuch</span> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> 08 Nov 09</span> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/159546-something-funny"><i class="fa fa-comment fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/159546-something-funny" title="found this on another thread and was psing myself laughing, cant take credit for it but v good ta space (v bored at work today) Re:HAVE A LAUGH 1 Year, 3 Months ago Why English Is Hard To Learn..." class=" topictitle">something funny</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> found this on another thread and was psing myself laughing, cant take credit for it but v good<br> ta space<br> (v bored at work today)<br> <br> Re:HAVE A LAU ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 04 Nov 09, by <span class="kwho-user">SPACEMANOEUVRES</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">0</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">420</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/155317-beer-scam-alert"><i class="fa fa-comments fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/155317-beer-scam-alert" title="Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink by any woman. Many females use a date-rape-drug on the market called 'Beer' ...." class=" topictitle">Beer Scam Alert</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink by any woman. Many females use a dat ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 18 Oct 09, by <span class="kwho-user">Helianthus</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div id="klastpostphone" class="visible-phone"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/155317-beer-scam-alert#155676" title="you won't catch me wearing a pringle jumper Heli! i would rather take my chances with beer..." rel="canonical">Latest</a> 19 Oct 09 by <span class="kwho-user">chris75</span> <div class="pull-right"> </div> </div> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">1</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">319</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/155317-beer-scam-alert#155676" title="you won't catch me wearing a pringle jumper Heli! i would rather take my chances with beer..." rel="canonical">Latest</a> by <span class="kwho-user">chris75</span> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> 19 Oct 09</span> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153784-definition-of-sleep-over-please"><i class="fa fa-comments fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153784-definition-of-sleep-over-please" title="Can anyone tell me why they are called Sleepovers?:blink: My 12 year old daughter had 4 friends for a "sleepover" on Saturday night for her birthday. They just forgot the sleep bit of it. Despite..." class=" topictitle">DEFINITION OF SLEEP-OVER PLEASE</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> Can anyone tell me why they are called Sleepovers?<img src="data:image/svg+xml;base64,PHN2ZyB4bWxucz0iaHR0cDovL3d3dy53My5vcmcvMjAwMC9zdmciIHdpZHRoPSIyMCIgaGVpZ2h0PSIyMCI+PC9zdmc+" data-src="/media/kunena/emoticons/blink.png" alt=":blink:" title=":blink:" class="bbcode_smiley jch-lazyload" width="20" height="20" /><noscript><img src="/media/kunena/emoticons/blink.png" alt=":blink:" title=":blink:" class="bbcode_smiley" width="20" height="20" /></noscript><br> <br> M ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 12 Oct 09, by <span class="kwho-user">AliPat</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div id="klastpostphone" class="visible-phone"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153784-definition-of-sleep-over-please?start=7#153848" title="My 11 year old was at a sleepover on Saturday just gone and next weekend its my turn but with just two they do chat but never disturb me so I allow them to stay awake until midnight and would you..." rel="canonical">Latest</a> 12 Oct 09 by <span class="kwho-user">pleaseuself</span> <div class="pull-right"> </div> </div> <div class="pull-left"> <div class="pagination pagination-small"> <ul> <li><a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153784-definition-of-sleep-over-please?start=0" title="Page:1">1</a></li><li><a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153784-definition-of-sleep-over-please?start=7" title="Page:2">2</a></li> </ul> </div> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">8</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">684</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153784-definition-of-sleep-over-please?start=7#153848" title="My 11 year old was at a sleepover on Saturday just gone and next weekend its my turn but with just two they do chat but never disturb me so I allow them to stay awake until midnight and would you..." rel="canonical">Latest</a> by <span class="kwho-user">pleaseuself</span> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> 12 Oct 09</span> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153381-lost-this-made-me-smile-my-ex-new-women"><i class="fa fa-comment fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/153381-lost-this-made-me-smile-my-ex-new-women" title="NEW BIRD SHE MAKES HIM LAUGTH I AM NOT SUPPRISED LOOKING LIKE THIS." class=" topictitle">lost this made me smile my ex new women</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> <span style="font-size:1.4em"></span> NEW BIRD SHE MAKES HIM LAUGTH<br> I AM NOT SUPPRISED LOOKING LIKE THIS. ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 10 Oct 09, by <span class="kwho-user">jacqui48</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">0</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">254</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/151939-chavs"><i class="fa fa-comment fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/151939-chavs" title="Phone convo with my 21 yr old. I went to a chav party last night, all having to be chavs. Did you Ange, how did you dress? I wrote my children's names up my arm. Yes, and (reeled them off) ending..." class=" topictitle">Chavs</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> Phone convo with my 21 yr old.<br> <br> I went to a chav party last night, all having to be chavs.<br> <br> Did you Ange, how did you dress?<br> <br> I wrote m ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 04 Oct 09, by <span class="kwho-user">enliven</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">0</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">338</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/145966-what-do-you-want-a-medal-yes-please"><i class="fa fa-comments fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/145966-what-do-you-want-a-medal-yes-please" title="Turns out that I am to be awarded the Victoria cross for outstanding valour and fortitude to sticking to my task in the face of enemy fire! Despite an excellent incentive package of a free house paid..." class=" topictitle">What do you want a medal?Yes Please!</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> Turns out that I am to be awarded the Victoria cross for outstanding valour and fortitude to sticking to my task in the face of enemy fire!<br> Despite an excel ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> <span title="Attachment"><i class="fa fa-paperclip" aria-hidden="true"></i></span> </div> <div class="started"> 13 Sep 09, by <span class="kwho-blocked">hawaythelads</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div id="klastpostphone" class="visible-phone"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/145966-what-do-you-want-a-medal-yes-please#150330" title="Pete Long time no see matey, how the hell are you doing, get in touch pal, for some reason I cant send you a message S" rel="canonical">Latest</a> 28 Sep 09 by <span class="kwho-user">Sgutt</span> <div class="pull-right"> </div> </div> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">4</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">398</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/145966-what-do-you-want-a-medal-yes-please#150330" title="Pete Long time no see matey, how the hell are you doing, get in touch pal, for some reason I cant send you a message S" rel="canonical">Latest</a> by <span class="kwho-user">Sgutt</span> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> 28 Sep 09</span> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147807-last-night-together"><i class="fa fa-comments fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147807-last-night-together" title="This is something my tbx would probably say..... A man is told by his doctor that he only has 12 hours to live. That night, he asks his wife if they can make love, as it will be their last night..." class=" topictitle">Last night together...</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> This is something my tbx would probably say.....<br> <br> <br> A man is told by his doctor that he only has 12 hours to live. That night, he asks his wife if th ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 20 Sep 09, by <span class="kwho-blocked">jxr</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div id="klastpostphone" class="visible-phone"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147807-last-night-together#147808" title="Liked that! Jo x" rel="canonical">Latest</a> 20 Sep 09 by <span class="kwho-blocked">JoannaA</span> <div class="pull-right"> </div> </div> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">1</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">299</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147807-last-night-together#147808" title="Liked that! Jo x" rel="canonical">Latest</a> by <span class="kwho-blocked">JoannaA</span> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> 20 Sep 09</span> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147711-funny-things-that-happened-in-court-lol"><i class="fa fa-comments fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147711-funny-things-that-happened-in-court-lol" title="at first hearing for Ancillary Relief - she wanted to ask question about £13,85 on my account direct debit - my barrister said it was actually for her mobile phone ... ha ha - she asked why i..." class=" topictitle">funny things that happened in court lol</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> at first hearing for Ancillary Relief<br> - she wanted to ask question about £13,85 on my account direct debit - my barrister said it was actually for her mob ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 19 Sep 09, by <span class="kwho-blocked">click</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div id="klastpostphone" class="visible-phone"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147711-funny-things-that-happened-in-court-lol#147727" title="My now ex wife and i were asked to attend a ten minute hearing so the judge could ask a few questions before sealing the consent order, not to worry i thought it was written by a guy soon to be a..." rel="canonical">Latest</a> 19 Sep 09 by <span class="kwho-moderator">dukey</span> <div class="pull-right"> </div> </div> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">2</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">365</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/147711-funny-things-that-happened-in-court-lol#147727" title="My now ex wife and i were asked to attend a ten minute hearing so the judge could ask a few questions before sealing the consent order, not to worry i thought it was written by a guy soon to be a..." rel="canonical">Latest</a> by <span class="kwho-moderator">dukey</span> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> 19 Sep 09</span> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="category"> <td class="hidden-phone span1 center"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/146830-the-delivery"><i class="fa fa-comment fa-2x"></i></a> </td> <td class="span5"> <div class="krow"> <a href="/forum-index/jokes-and-humour/146830-the-delivery" title="A married couple went to the hospital together to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labour..." class=" topictitle">The Delivery</a> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added preview of post in latest posts list --> <br/> <div class="post-preview"> A married couple went to the hospital together to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transf ... </div> </div> <div class="pull-right"> </div> <div class="started"> 16 Sep 09, by <span class="kwho-user">goldfish11</span> <div class="pull-right hidden-phone"> </div> </div> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> <div class="pull-left"> </div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="replies">Replies:<span class="repliesnum">0</span></div> <div class="views">:<span class="viewsnum">358</span></div> </td> <td class="span2 hidden-phone"> <div class="container-fluid"> <div class="row-fluid"> <div class="span12"> <span class="lastpostlink"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </span> <br> <span class="datepost"> <!-- IJR Nov 2023 - added IF to only show reply link if any replies --> </div> </div> </div> </td> </tr> </tbody> <tfoot> <tr> <td class="center hidden-phone"> <a id="forumbottom"> </a> <a href="#forumtop" 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home-section-title"> <h3 style="text-align: center;">Negotiate a fair deal from £299</h3> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-image wiki-shop-3col-image"><img src="/images/services/300/divorce-consultant.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="200" class="qx-img qx-img-responsive ls-is-cached" data-src="images/services/300/divorce-consultant.jpg"></div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text wiki-shop-3col-text"> <p style="text-align: justify;">Helping you negotiate a fair financial settlement with your spouse (or their solicitor) without going to court.</p> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-button"><a href="/services/financial-settlements/helping-you-to-negotiate-a-fair-financial-settlement-3-hours.html" class="qx-btn order-now-button qx-btn-default"> <i class="fa fa-arrow-circle-right"></i> Negotiate a Fair Deal </a></div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text qx-hidden-lg qx-hidden-md"><hr class="wiki-shop-hr"></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="qx-column wiki-qx-column 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</div> </div> </div> <div class="qx-column wiki-qx-column qx-col-lg-3 qx-col-md-6 qx-col-sm-6 qx-col-xs-12"> <div class="qx-col-wrap"> <div class="qx-element-wrap"> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text home-section-title"> <h3 style="text-align: center;">Consent Orders from £950</h3> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-image wiki-shop-3col-image qx-hidden-xs"><img src="/images/optimised/consent-order.webp" alt="" width="300" height="200" class="qx-img qx-img-responsive ls-is-cached" data-src="images/optimised/consent-order.webp"></div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text wiki-shop-3col-text"> <p>This legally binding agreement defines how assets (e.g. properties and pensions) are to be divided.</p> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-button"><a href="/services/financial-settlements/clean-break-consent-order.html" class="qx-btn order-now-button qx-btn-default"> <i class="fa fa-arrow-circle-right"></i> Consent Order </a></div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text 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class="fa fa-arrow-circle-right"></i> Court Support </a></div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text qx-hidden-lg qx-hidden-md"><hr class="wiki-shop-hr"></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div style="clear: both;"> </div> <!-- END: Articles Anywhere --></div> </div></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </section> <section id="g-bottom"> <div class="g-container"> <div class="g-grid"> <div class="g-block size-100"> <div class="g-content"> <div class="platform-content"><div class="moduletable "> <div class="custom" > <!-- START: Articles Anywhere --><div class="qx-inner windows_nt_10_0 classic qx-type-section"> <div class="qx-section dark-footer"> <div class="qx-row"> <div class="qx-column qx-col-lg-12 qx-col-md-12 qx-col-sm-12 qx-col-xs-12"> <div class="qx-col-wrap"> <div class="qx-element-wrap"> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"> <h2 style="text-align: center;"><br>The Complete Guide to Divorce in the UK</h2> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="qx-row"> <div class="qx-column wiki-qx-column qx-col-lg-3 qx-col-md-6 qx-col-sm-6 qx-col-xs-12"> <div class="qx-col-wrap"> <div class="qx-element-wrap"> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text home-section-title"> <h3>Free DIY Guide To Divorce</h3> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"> <ul> <li><a href="/guides-divorce/how-to-guides/step-1-initial-checks.html">Grounds for divorce in the UK</a></li> <li><a href="/guides-divorce/how-to-guides/step-2-submit-your-divorce-application-to-court.html">Submit divorce application</a></li> <li><a href="/guides-divorce/how-to-guides/step-5-apply-for-decree-nisi.html">Apply for Decree Nisi</a></li> <li><a href="/guides-divorce/how-to-guides/step-6-apply-for-decree-absolute.html">Apply for Decree Absolute</a></li> </ul> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"><hr></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="qx-column wiki-qx-column qx-col-lg-3 qx-col-md-6 qx-col-sm-6 qx-col-xs-12"> <div class="qx-col-wrap"> <div class="qx-element-wrap"> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text home-section-title"> <h3>Calculate a Fair Settlement</h3> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"> <ul> <li><a href="/guides-financial-settlements/how-to-calculate-a-fair-financial-divorce-settlement.html">UK law on divorce settlements</a></li> <li><a href="/divorce-calculator/divorce-calculator.html">Free online divorce calculator</a></li> <li><a href="/divorce-calculator/divorce-calculation-method.html">Our Calculation Methodology</a></li> <li><a href="/divorce-calculator/divorce-calculator-start.html">Start your Divorce Calculation</a></li> </ul> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"><hr></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="qx-column wiki-qx-column qx-col-lg-3 qx-col-md-6 qx-col-sm-6 qx-col-xs-12"> <div class="qx-col-wrap"> <div class="qx-element-wrap"> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text home-section-title"> <h3>Financial Settlement Process</h3> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"> <ul> <li><a href="/guides-financial-settlements/step-by-step-process/step-1-financial-disclosure.html">Financial disclosure Form E</a></li> <li><a href="/guides-financial-settlements/step-by-step-process/step-2-how-can-i-find-out-what-is-a-fair-settlement.html">Legal advice on fair settlement</a></li> <li><a href="/guides-financial-settlements/step-by-step-process/step-3-negotiation.html">Negotiate a divorce settlement</a></li> <li><a href="/guides-financial-settlements/step-by-step-process/step-4-applying-to-court-for-a-financial-order.html">Apply to court for finances</a></li> </ul> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"><hr></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="qx-column wiki-qx-column qx-col-lg-3 qx-col-md-6 qx-col-sm-6 qx-col-xs-12"> <div class="qx-col-wrap"> <div class="qx-element-wrap"> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text home-section-title"> <h3>Financial Agreements</h3> </div> <div class="qx-element qx-element-text"> <ul> <li><a 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